Happy New Year (audio)

Earlier this week I recorded a New Year’s call. Wanted to share it with you today in case you need a boost. Sometimes sober weekends seem long and vacant. Here’s something to help fill the time 🙂 You can dip into this, in bits and pieces 10 minutes at a time. Or you can get a cup of tea and hear it all at once.

You’ll want to listen right to the end where we’re talking about the phrase “but i want to go to sleep for 30 days and wake up with this part already over…”

links mentioned in the audio:

  • Sober Jumpstart
  • Archived podcasts
  • was there anything else i mentioned that i should put here?

Leave a comment and I’ll choose one as the sober rockstar comment of the day.

Open Call: New Year’s Day

i had an an open call on American Thanksgiving and one for Christmas … and i’m thinking it might be lovely to get together again and do an Open Call for New Year’s Day. Topic? I’m open to suggestions (email me questions/ideas) but it might be fun to brainstorm further the idea of New Year / New You …

(I will shift the times for open calls each time i have one, so that different time zones are favoured, sorry in advance if this one doesn’t work for you.)

listen-herelinks mentioned in this audio:

Open Call: Christmas

So i recorded the Christmas open call a few days in advance, so that I could have it ready and it would magically appear on the 24th. Technology is divine! Click on the blue button to listen. You can dip into this, in bits and pieces, if you need a boost. or you can get a cup of tea and hear it all at once.

[link removed; available for download here]

I also recorded a subscriber podcast on Sunday about taking care of your inner little chicken, and explaining a bit about my heart thing and how it parallels sobriety. if you’d like more audios, you can click here.

Christmas Open Call

i had an an open call on American Thanksgiving and i wanted to do one again for Christmas … but i’m going to be on vacation (let there be unicorns), and i’ll be hiding in a town filled with christmas lights (and snow), spending christmas day in a hotel (no cooking!).

So instead of having a live call on christmas day, i thought i’d record an open call NOW and then post it on the site on christmas eve. (Slackers of the world unite!)

(I will shift the times for open calls every time i hold one, so that different time zones are favoured, sorry in advance if this one doesn’t work for you.)

[call has already been recorded]

top Numero Uno benefit of being sober

Here’s an extract from yesterday’s open call. You can listen to the complete recording here.

(13:00) “If you had to pick one top Numero Uno benefit of being sober, what would it be?”

I think it would be being able to count on myself. Because part of what i hated about drinking was the promises that I made to myself that I would have one, or none, or two [drinks], or that I would skip a night – and really not being able to do it. And I thought that the problem was with me. I thought I didn’t have enough willpower, that I didn’t want it bad enough. It never occurred to me that the alcohol was additive, or making me dependent, or making me feel needy, or that wolfie would act up [if I drank] and then settle down. None of that occurred to me. Never occurred to me. Ever.

The only thing that ever occurred to me was that I was a fuck-up and could not get my shit together. … the noise in my head was grim. it doesn’t even really matter what you present on the outside, it’s how you feel about you on the inside.

So the number one biggest benefit of being sober is all of that stopped. It all stopped. All of the “why aren’t you good enough … other people seem to be able to drink socially … other people seem to be able to quit … are you going to turn out like those other family members that are alcoholics?”

“No, no, of course. No no, I’m not an alcoholic.” [I’d say to myself]. “I just drink every night. I’m not an alcoholic. I could quit. Well I can’t really quit. Well quitting is actually really hard.”

It never occurred to me that I could actually feel better about myself if could stop drinking. It was a fiction.

There are of course lots of other benefits to being sober: fewer regrets, less shame, spending less money, consuming fewer calories.

But knowing that i can count on myself is kind of the best part for me (so far!). and you?

happy turkey day

Open Call Today

(aka first time doing this, ack! will it work? will anyone send in questions?)

So i recorded the live call phone-in call today. My apologies for inconsistent sound quality. I’ll try to fix that next time 😉

Click on the blue link to listen:

[link removed; available for download here]


Are you playing Dysfunctional Family Bingo? I’ll be waiting all day to see your posts/emails about Thanksgiving Dinner!

Dysfunctional Family Bingo

ok, so here’s the bingo game. Instead of getting all involved in everyone’s business (“i take care of me, you take care of you”), instead of feeling personally wounded at each critique (“what do you mean you don’t like homemade cranberry sauce and you prefer canned”), and instead of getting all twisted around in family dynamics (“she sits beside him because he ignores how much she drinks”)… yes, instead of all that, how about we go into these events as an observer.

Thanksgiving Dinner. You’re only there for a short time, and your job is to take notes, observe, and record behaviours (like a social anthropologist).

To make it fun, during your Thanksgiving Dinner on Thursday, see how many of these items you can spot during the meal.

Resetting the table because it’s not done right
“My pie isn’t like this…” (food critique)
Bragging about money, bonus, or expensive vacation
“So when are you going to get married?”
Feeding the dog from the dinner table

Unannounced vegetarian suddenly mentions they don’t eat meat

“Are you pregnant yet?”
Asleep in the chair (bonus points if it’s at the dinner table)

Spilled alcohol

Nose picking
“I don’t eat that”
Illegal drug use
Leaving table to smoke while others are still eating
Racial slur

Swearing in front of children

Heated religious discussion
Texting at the table
Something gets broken

For one day only (Thursday, November 28th), you can post here any time you see any of these bingo items. Post a comment here or send me an email. Don’t get caught posting, though, or you’ll have to check off one of the boxes for yourself. You might only witness 3 or 4 of these, but you might see all 20 depending on the size of the gathering. Happy Turkey Day.