from apprentice elise: ‘my all-time favorite podcast’

from penpal marmar: 
“You know what’s awesome? I’m in bed! Sober! It’s 10 pm! … I listened to 2 audios today … The ‘I wish I could fly’ audio definitely resonated with me. And on the note, Belle did comment that something was different about that audio but she couldn’t put her finger on what. I’m not sure, either, but it struck me that it was a little more ‘tough love’ than some of the others – maybe? … Belle likes to tell it like it is – not really much sugar coating there. Because sobriety is fucking important – who has time for sugar coating it or beating around the bush? But with the tough love there’s also sarcasm and humor, so there’s some lightheartedness mixed in there.  Sobriety is fucking important but if you make it ‘if you don’t get sober you’ll DIE!!’ — in your face — that’s not really going to help people hear the message… My point is, I think in that audio, Belle is getting even more to the core of it. You can’t drink, just like you can’t fly. As much as you WANT to, you can’t. Those of us who have managed some decent period of sobriety “get it” on some level. I didn’t before. And I’ll never forget my first phone call with Belle; she called me out – in her Belle gentle-but-not way – for saying I wanted to be sober but not really being serious about it, or something to that effect. She was 100% correct.  And once you get it, you REALLY want others to get it! And so sometimes you get more urgent about it, more like, “don’t you see how silly it is to wish you could drink?!” Hard to articulate that in writing … The “I Wish I Could Fly” audio, in a good way, is like a call to attention.”


Apprentice Elise: “Hands down, the best audio for me that Belle has ever recorded [is ‘I Wish I Could Fly.’] I listen to it regularly. I love that I can use it in reference to drinking, but to other things as well (for me, it really applies to my mental health stuff and the challenges of raising my three awesome autistic kids).”

Apprentice Elise: “One of my favorite sober audios that Belle has ever recorded is  “I Wish I Could Fly.” It’s an audio that really captures that “this is your thing” idea for me, and I can listen to it and apply it to any one of my “things” anytime.”

Apprentice Elise: “I don’t think I’ve told you before, but “I Wish I Could Fly” is my favorite sober audio ever. It’s listening gold. And it’s listening gold because it’s about how we can wish we can fly all we want, but we can’t fly. And we can wish that alcohol wasn’t the issue we have, but it is. So, yeah, sometimes we’re going to cry about it, be mad at it, scream about it, or just plain be annoyed, but it’s our thing. And that’s ok. You can handle that. It’s not fair, but you can handle it.”

Apprentice Elise: “I Wish I Could Fly might be my all-time favorite podcast. It helps when I’m facing a situation that just seems so unfair or impossible (like a chronic health condition or a virus that’s impacting the world) to listen to Belle kind of whine like I want to whine. “But I wanna fllllyyyy.” And then to talk us through why we can want this sober life anyway.”

archived podcast #229 called “i wish i could fly” is part of a podcast bundle you can download here. then you can listen to them over and over, particularly this episode. and the one called temptation. and the one about lindsay lohan. link here.


I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012