#dryJuly Day 2 – Nice to see you :)

just thought i’d open up this space where we can introduce ourselves. the goal for dryjuly is continuous days sober. you can say what day you’re on today, and later i’ll do another post and you can report in your continuous days so far.

you can put in a screen name when it asks for your ‘name’. and email addresses are NOT displayed (EVER). i also approve every comment before it is posted 🙂

you can say who you are, what day you’re on, and WHY you’re doing #dryJuly

ok, i’ll start …

​new painting posted > www.artsober.com

Belle

I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

  • Hi, this is my first time commenting. I’m 16 days sober as of today. I am a nurse on a Covid unit so when everything got stressful at work, it exacerbated my alcohol problem. I’ve been drinking for a long time. I was trying to moderate and failing. Had an episode where I drank an entire bottle of vodka and couldn’t stand up at the beach with my friends and had to be “taken care of”. When I start I can’t stop. My friends were saying they were having a hard time dealing with my anxiety…I always had hangxiety on top of an anxiety disorder. After I got in a big fight with my bf the week after that (from drinking too much again), I decided to cut it out completely. Probably for forever, but saying that is a little scary. I’m feeling good so far, much less anxiety, have a positive outlook and not too many cravings. However, my bf still drinks about twice a week and I notice I get really irritable when he does. I try to distract myself or do something on my own, or drink a ginger beer but it still bothers me. It brings up a lot of feelings. Hoping that goes away soon. If anyone has advice about having a partner who still drinks, I’d love some. Sorry for the rant. Love the blog Belle!

    • Good for you! I remember how hard and scary it was in those early day. Belle has a series of readings on quitting while your significant other still imbides. Look up her name on Amazon. It’s a short “booklet” for like $2. Or email her about it. Thank you for your hard work and may peace find your days.

    • hahaha. Just read this from an older belle blog post and thought you would enjoy:
      Doesn’t matter what anyone else is doing. Doesn’t matter. If you were a vegetarian – or running a marathon, or studying to be a nurse – you wouldn’t need your husband or your best friend to do the same thing.

      This is you the vegetarian:

      You order lentils with a soft poached egg on top, while your friend has eggs and bacon bun. If she says “don’t you miss bacon” you smile sweetly and you say: “sometimes I miss bacon, but I like how I feel as a vegetarian.” You don’t need your husband or your best friend to join you. If you feel lonely or uninspired, then you take some time to read vegetarian cookbooks, listen to ‘bacon is bad for you’ podcasts, you find like-minded folks online, and you have a vegetarian coach who helps you find new inspiring recipes. [Please understand that this is only an example. I think that bacon is the world’s perfect food.] …

  • Day 1 for me again. Probably the 3rd time. I went 2 months about a year ago , but unfortunately started again. I know in my heart that I want to quit, especially for health reasons! I am not a drunk but easily can drink 12 to 14 beers a day and function perfectly. However I have to hide it from my wife and that is a pain to. I hope to make it to 100 days and Belle will be my Angel in disguise. I really do not have that many friends so I really have to rely on myself and help from Belle and other podcasts that I listen to. Thanks for your help and keeping my fingers crossed.

  • Today is Day 28 for me 🙂 I am doing DryJuly for added support with my sobriety. This is the first time that I have ever made an online/public post about my relationship with alcohol; I hope that this will help keep me on this freeing path.

  • Day 3 – Hi everyone, I have been hanging around on the periphery of going sober for 2-3 years now, not committing to going sober, convincing myself that I am not addicted. If I am honest, drinking alcohol has always been a problem for me but since my divorce in 2016, the lift (elevator) has gone right down to a place, where it isn’t fun anymore. I have gained about 2 stone in weight, my anxiety is through the roof and the hangovers last for a day! I realise I have tried to quit and failed because the ‘Wolfie’ wine voice is so loud and I need a lot of support to do this! I am committed to 30 days and then I will work it out from there.

  • Day 26 for myself here! Going well so far. I’ve finally accepted that being sober and completely alcohol free is what I want and what I need. I’ve accepted that I can’t drink any amount. I’m finally good with that. I feel so much better already and can’t wait to continue to reap the benefits of a sober life.

  • Good morning! I am on day 39. I am trying something new – for my sober toolbox 🤗 Have only read blogs and muscled through on my own before. Works for awhile but then, not so much. I love being part of a group of people that understand and I don’t feel alone. A little accountability is good too! I am doing the 100 Day Challenge. I know I can do it, and it will give me the momentum for the next 100, and the next! I can’t keep trying moderation. Kind of amazed me that I polished off a bottle the first night I tried just on weekend drinking…. Writing this down and having others read it is a big step for me. Thank you, Belle and everyone else that is here on this journey. Virtual hugs to all of us!

  • Hi. This is day two of dry July but I think that 30 days or so might not be enough. .. Always the biggest drinker, first to the party, last to leave. I have told myself drinking wine at home every night is more responsible than going to the pub (since last oct/nov time). I came to faith 4 years ago – if I prayed as often as I thought about drinking miracles would happen! Two days ago after 2 bottles of wine and a tin of gin mix to ‘finish me off’, I vomited badly, and I wet myself. And remember it all. No one in my life will ever know that. Its very hard to read that. But I am glad I had The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober in my book case (yes been here before) and she recommended this site. So yes I can be honest in the anonymity. And some accountability.

  • Day 29 for me, been here before but want to make it stick this time. 4th of July today not doing great. Husband drinking and I’m ready for new things, being stuck at home so long not helping. Been feeling good before today so I’ll just keep going, not giving in to wolfie!

  • Happy Independence from alcohol day! Doing dry July to start my 100 day challenge. Day 1 was June 8. Tired of Endless anxiety, embarrassing myself, and feeling bad in the mornings. Tired of thinking about drinking is a perfect way to state how I feel. Not sure I’m an alcoholic but it is NOT my friend. Feels good to feel good.

  • Beginning of day 6 for me, today is 4th of July, huge drinking day here, yesterday I told my neighbors that I would not be drinking at their BBQ today (small gathering only 6 of us neighbors and we will be social distancing), instead of support, the response I got was “you have to drink, it is the 4th of July”. I proceeded to tell them I was doing dry July, their response, start on the 5th and go thru August 5th. Followed by we want two beer fun (insert my real name here) to show up! My response, two beer fun me only shows up for about 1/2 hour, then I am onto 4-5 beer me which is not fun! (and you don’t deal with the hang over, I do!) I don’t think people understand how hurtful it is when they tell you that you are more fun when you are drunk…
    So how to deal with the BBQ, I think I have 3 options:
    1. do not go
    2. go and do not drink, if I get harrassed to do so just leave
    3. go with a non alcoholic drink and tell them there is alcohol in the glass

    Sorry to go on like this, I don’t want to drink today, I am very stubborn which sometimes works in my favor, so I am not going to drink today. I have my husbands support, I can do this. This converstion has bothered me all night, so happy to get it out of my head to people who understand!
    thanks for reading, have a great day everyone!

  • Hi all,

    Day 43 here and feeling great, sleeping better, parenting with more patience and clarity….but I only have one friend who is AF and sometimes feel my world is soaked in booze. I’m here for community and accountability. Huge thanks to you Belle, your book and podcasts have really been a gift on this journey!

  • Hello all

    Day 52 today (day 3 here) and I’m here to keep myself accountable on this journey. I’ve read somewhere that it takes around 90 days to undo the learnt behaviour I have when it comes to this horrendous addition. Alcohol has been my crutch and go to for more years than I care to remember… consumed totally by the next time I can have a drink, rotating shops in order not to visit the same too many times. Surrounding the alcohol with ‘normal purchases’ in the basket to make the alcohol look like a mere after thought. I am tired of this constant existence and physically and mentally exhausted. On a positive I feel much better at day 52 (and believe me I ever thought I could get this far) I still have cravings and down moments but am now starting to see the trees, the flowers and hear the bird song without Wolfie taking over my entire being. Wishing us all a sober day and a step in the right direction, towards the sunny outlook and further away day by day from the wolf on our backs.

    Lost of hugs 🤗 to Belle you truly are inspirational and have made a huge difference to my life x

  • Day 3 for me. I am ready to quit drinking FOREVER. I haven’t written or said this before. I have tried multiple times, and am kind of freaked out that I may fail. But over the past 6 months I have had a much bigger percent of AF days than ever.

    My husband supports this. I have IBS that is probably the result of 25+ years of drinking too much wine and being a nervous person, and having had stressful jobs.

    I don’t want Wolfie to win. I’m ready to stop drinking.

  • Day 5. I’m worried I’m not fun when I don’t drink. My bf drinks and we (used to) love drinking together. I use drinking to overcome my fear of intimacy. I feel bad not drinking with him. I can’t leave him behind and I can’t force him on this journey with me. So I’m just not drinking and hoping I’m still just as fun, spontaneous and sexy as I am when I’m not drinking. I’m also stressed that I’ll start drinking again because I promised him I’d have a drink on my birthday which is this coming Monday. I’ve never been a falling down drunk or a day drinker but I was up to three glasses of wine a night and I hate the guilt I feel.

  • Day 2. Because it’s time. Trying to do what’s best for me. And coming here for community and accountability.

  • Day 8 for me – Wife asked me how I felt last night and I said much better. She said what are you going to do at the end of 30 days? I dont know I said, get there and figure it out. She then said that going AF full time wont work, I will regress and go back to my old ways. She just want to be able to have a glass of wine with me at dinner, when we go out etc, if I cant do that then I need help. The problem is (and like Belle said in her Month 1 and 2) is that I dont want just one, I want to whole bottle. Is there a way to manage this after 30 days or just keep it AF forever?

    • Hi tallandsober! How are you doing? Just read that. Don’t give in in having “just this one glass”, I would suggest. It’s not worth it. If your wife isn’t able to enjoy her glass of wine while you’re having something non-alcoholic, she might like to ask herself what her problem is with having her glass of wine. Hang in there!

  • Day 3, I want to do this, I need to do this, I’m fed up with every minute of the day just thinking of drinking. I’m finding it hard, I have no one to talk to, to encourage me, I’m worried that at a time of weakness that my own will power won’t be enough

  • I am on Day 36 and find I am losing motivation. I am isolating again. I sound pathetic, but I want a real friend. Being by myself doesn’t work too well for me. So tired.

    • I’m new here Amy, but your words speak to me. I’m sending you good, friendly vibes and I’m here with you in spirit. Congrats on your 36 days so far!

  • I’m 60 days sober today, I want to better myself, be 100%present for my kids and leave my job, which I hate and start up my own business, fear as kept me in the same position for 20 years, I’m doing this and so pleased to be 60 days in, got to keep focused😁