i worry about …
I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012
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This isn’t possibly the best place for this but here goes nothing.
I saw this award (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b09hrzmd – BBC Radio 4 All In The Mind Awards) and I thought Belle should get it so I have nominated her, but I bet there are others out there who have better stories than mine to tell about Belle, and the more nominations she gets the better I say. You don’t have to be in the UK to nominate her (and obviously Belle isn’t and doesn’t have to be ‘cos she’s virtual and therefore a citizen of the world). I think the closing date for nominations is 31st January.
Did you nominate her for the professional or individual award
Individual – I don’t think Belle claims to be a professional (cook maybe)
I had gotten to the point where I wondered if I could handle what WOULD happen if I continued drinking… The backlash of my addiction would be out of my hands and would negatively impact my family and my livelihood… I know that tomorrow is coming whether I drink or not… I KNOW my path and it does not include a beverage leading the way… I have handled my beast for long enough and I have decided that I have nothing left to prove to “her”… I KNOW I can handle my shit because I know that I’m better, sharper with a clear mind… I no longer need “her” fog as an excuse for my stress and shortcomings… I got this… And if I don’t handle it all today… Tomorrow is coming… And that bitch is mine… SOBER
2018…what calls…breathing in the moment…attention to the details…sitting in the now…noticing…no judgements (as much as possible), space for space, showing up and being present, gentle with self and all the flaws, acceptance.
Space for space. I like that.
Poignant. And so so true. LJC
Like my spinning teacher always says… don’t anticipate pain! …it’s all in our heads… and I think Wolfie is up there pushing that button hard! Screw him! I’m going to focus on right now and right now I’m not drinking and I’m doing just fine. Stay here… it’s good!
I like this “don’t anticipate pain”. I was dreading lunch on Sunday with the in-laws and had such a low moment I had to take myself back to bed as it was only my day 5 and the first meal that would involve alcohol. I got through it and it wasn’t so bad. The anticipation was worse than the event itself. One to remember thanks!
It’s our nature as overdrinkers to worry about future things…..i’m worried about vacation. In july…it’s january and there’s a blizzard here in NY… have to stay in the moment.