Turns out, quitting drinking is harder than we think. Turns out, we rely on alcohol more than we think. Turns out, getting off of the booze elevator (that only goes down) is harder than we think. Turns out, we have a problem with thinking about drinking. Turns out there ARE sober people who’ve figured this out that we can learn from (be inspired from).
Turns out, trying to moderate is harder than just stopping entirely for a fixed length of time (let me suggest 100 days, and then you can go on from there).
Turns out, drinking isn’t compatible with wellness, weight loss, being present, reading a book and remembering it, feeling proud of yourself, waking with a sense of encouragement and possibility. Turns out, any amount of alcohol activates the ‘Drink Now’ voice in our heads.
Turns out that you alone in your head can’t sort out what’s YOU and what’s the booze voice making ‘reasonable’ claims. You know, reasons why you HAVE to drink (like you deserve it, like other people drink more than you, that no one has told you you’re drinking too much).
“I have to drink because I won’t be any fun” – as if over-drinking is LOTS of fun. Not.
“I have to drink because what will I say to people?” – as if saying you’re doing a 100 day (fitness) challenge would that be too unrealistic.
“I have to drink because my partner drinks” – as if you do everything they do, including shave your face.
“I have to drink because I’m not really an alcoholic and if I quit drinking people will think I have a problem” – yes, that’s it, keep drinking. Right. Makes perfect sense.
That you need some tools to help you with all that ‘thinking about drinking’ is normal. That you want to do it quietly and anonymously is also normal.
How about you don’t drink, because then you feel better. How about you don’t drink, because it’s congruent with who you want to be. How about you don’t drink for 100 days and see how you like it.
I’m on day 9, returned to work after a long summer break. People are telling me I look really good. Nothing has changed, except I haven’t been drinking. Suddenly, everything’s changed 🙂
I am on day 83. I do feel a lot better, especially emotionally. Calmer, more content. Socialising is still a bitch though. I get bored and restless. Hope that will improve.
All so true Belle . I’m waiting to see just how repulsive and ridiculous this habit is I look for every reason you mentioned above , plus,10 billion more. My latest is, I probably have done the damage and it is too late, so what’s the point! ?!
It is really and truly no longer enjoyable . I am trying to get to day 2 and then 3 and so on…
Thanks for the great post
You’re spot on, Belle (as usual). I’ve run through this litany of tired, absurd, useless and downright dangerous “reaons” why I should keep drinking. None of them hold up to the light of day. Thanks for reminding me.
yup, yup and yup. this is like my 37th attempt at the 100 day challenge and I am on day 16. Best yet! and the wellness, I think that’s what is keeping me going so far. I just got grossed out by how glassy my eyes look when I drink. And the last week or two before I quit, I noticed it happened after even one single drink. I don’t want to look sick, or tired, or drunk! I don’t want to be sick, or tired, or drunk. So the times I have been tempted in the last two weeks, I think “I will be sick if I drink that.” Suddenly not so enticing.
Anonymous— A real friend will allow you to cancel, especially when you need to take care of yourself.
Nailed it for me: Turns out any amount of alcohol turns on the Drink Now voice! I’ve GOT to remember this!
Agree with every line! How do you read my mind? I will cut and paste this on my forehead 🙂
Wonderful post. I continue to talk myself out of stopping and your posts are helping me get there.
This is so true. It’s one of my most motivating factors – that drinking does not align with the person I want to be. Healthy, strong, present, content and the list goes on!
Great post. Brings light to the many stupid reasons we think we had to drink. Day 31 and working hard at it. 😉 thanks for being an inspiration.
I’m on Day 57. On Day 74, I will fly into Paris. For the next month I will be in France, Switzerland, and Italy…so add to the above list of rationalizations “I’ll be in EUROPE! Two weeks in Bourgogne without even one glass of Burgundy? Italy…a week on the Amalfi coast senza vino? Come onnnnnn!” The past eight weeks have been relatively easy, but this upcoming challenge is something that I simply don’t know what to do about. I mean, of course, I KNOW, what to do, but…how very dispiriting (pun intended?)
Love this. I have not drank in 2 weeks. I feel so strong. I have tried this so many times and I finally realized what you said about easier not to drink than to moderate. This is so true. My friend who I have not hung with in months asked me to hang on Friday night. I agreed but as we get closer I have such anxiety over it. I know that drinking heavily is the only thing we share In common. This is why I assosiate her with fun. Wolfie is telling me I need to keep plan becuase she will be hurt if I don’t and that I deserve to let loose. I know it is a bad idea and absolutely hate idea of starting g over when I have such great momentum. May take me another 3-4 mk the to get back on. I feel so strong. Yet my addictive head is all over that good night out and can’t think about the hangover and hate me’s and disappointment that will result. Help!
Don’t do it postpone until you are feeling stronger or postpone permanently if the only thing you have in common is drinking you are so worth it xx
Thank you! I needed to hear that. I cancelled plan. Gonna hang out with kids and watch a movie and order in.
Thanks Belle. Again, just what I needed as I’m white knuckling on day 5–again.
Please ask for help, quitting drinking and shutting up Wolfie is easier with the WE of support with you. Big treats and sober support will help you onward with your journey. Good luck!
Great post. I used to think I had to drink because I didn’t have a choice. Doing the 100 day challenge enabled me to see I have that choice – and I choose not to drink.
Turns out drinking creates a chasm of deep, gut wrenching, bottomless sadness that you think will stay with you forever. Until you stop. And then it heals.