problem with treats (update)

Doing a live call tomorrow that will be posted on Christmas Day. If you like to join us, go here.

From me: I seem to have broken through my spending problem which i wrote about in the micro-email on Friday. I finally realized that I didn’t have to figure out WHY i was doing it, i just had to act differently. I have ordered lights for the living room AND the big nice chair. and a new bed frame is being delivered tomorrow. Soon our unfurnished apartment will have stuff. Not much stuff, but it’s a start. (Also last night, in bed, schemed with Mr. B. on places we can go for dinner over the break, as part of our treats. Should we go to the expensive dinner place? or how about the really good pasta place AND the gallery cafe AND the rooftop place instead of the one big one. Decided.)

Got some very lovely and thoughtful feedback from this email, including:


“This sounds really familiar! I notice that what I don’t ‘need’ gets more and more. To the point where my shoes have holes, my clothes are worn, and the things I use day to day are half broken or worn out. This may be left over from my booze days where I had little spare money to buy things with.”


“I agree with you Belle, it is difficult to treat ourselves to anything nice! for some reason I have never felt like I was worth enough to spend any money on. It is okay for me if someone spends it on me but I can’t seem to do it for myself. What a gift it would be if we could rid ourselves of this very old worn-out childhood message!”


“Well, point is, you NEED and DESERVE a whole heck of a lot more than one lonely ol’ little pot of pointsetta. Go out there and shop for yourself.  We are ALL expecting a full report of all your treats, and you best make it worthy of you. Grins, Amos

Don’t mess with these instructions, in short.

just stop and think of how many people will be experiencing much healthier, saner and real holidays and new years in large part due to you.

*….DID you think about that?

What’s that worth?  OK, it’s not a cancer cure, but it’s more than having a platinum record.  So you are the equivalent at the very least of rock star, for real.

No need to respond.  In fact, Do NOT until after shopping ensues.

(then later): Get the Chair!!  What you are doing is really quite phenomenal, you know.

I mean, I’m close to a year.  If you added up how much time we’ve all got, and how many of us attribute our ongoing maintenance to you, it’s a wonder to us that you don’t just wake up some day and decide to start billing us.

you are worth whatever’s been sent and beyond.  So what color chair?”



I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

  • I owe so much to you Belle and I’m so happy that your home is taking shape, you deserve to be comfy in your nest. And no tappy lady overhead 🙂
    AM xxxx