is it better to be sober?
from my inbox:
Gra: “It is my day 180 today. When I started this, all I wanted was to see if I could get to day 100. I had many failed 30s albeit with no support, and I decided to take up your challenge. I knew I wasn’t happy with my relationship with drink, but I wasn’t too sure how committed I was to giving up alcohol completely.
Something about 100 days and the idea of the challenge appealed, so I gave it a go.
Boy, what a change it has brought.
All of a sudden I am in this club, daily mails, constant support and praise wtf, I certainly wasn’t expecting that.
As the momentum built, I knew that the idea of going back to where I was when I drank just seemed like a worse and more unattractive place.
I kind of thought I was somehow unique in my interpretation of the world and now I know I am not that unique and many of us, all of us who share in this dirty relationship with wolfie, have some of the similar fucked up traits and thought processes FOMO a prime example….
What a comfort! And hearing your words Belle, and those of everybody else here that contributes makes me realise I am in fine company, and you know what, I am doing well and life is good. Wolfie seldom turns up now and if he does, I am not interested, I have a bigger game to play.
So here at 180 …. I don’t think I will ever drink alcohol again…. who would have thought! And that prospect seems to be the sanest, self protecting, most life affirming feeling I have had. I am in, I am committed to the next 100 days….
Thanks for being my fourth leg of my sober table.”
Krist: “Hiya Belle, just a quickie to let you know that as of the 21 October I am an entire year alcohol free. It has been the most amazing, powerful, humbling, eye-opening, stomach churning, pride causing year of my life.
It became a real possibility the day I found your blog in January 2013 and realised that AA was not the only way. After quite a few false starts I finally made the choice and it stuck.
I don’t drink, I don’t want to drink.
And for me that is one of the most fantastic achievements of my life.
There are a lot of different elements which make up my sober armour – sober blogs, self development, sober reading, addiction counselling. Your blog was one of the first that I turned to for reassurance and support and to read the stories of people just like me who were trying and failing and trying and succeeding. It gave me courage and it gave me hope and for that I will be forever grateful.”
Hana: “The difference between 1 year sober vs 10 days sober:
- I’m now 100% positive sobriety is the best decision I’ve made. Had some real doubts about whether my drinking was a short or long term problem, but now I’m just really, really glad I stopped the cycle.
- Cravings are pretty much nil – however I still need to be very vigilant because when they do show up, they’re really sneaky and intense. I’ve learned to tell myself, “don’t believe the hype, just keep going”! It works, and when the cravings pass I’m always filled with immense gratitude for continued sobriety.
- I dealt with (and am still working on) A LOT of emotional stuff to get comfortable with sobriety. It’s definitely a mind game identifying triggers and uncovering reasons why I was so driven to drink when faced with discomfort and stress. It’s been hard work at times but well worth the benefits of insightful self reflection.
- I’m so hydrated, I sleep well, I don’t have shame and self loathing. I laugh and cry much, much easier. I’m more authentic. I’m more grounded and calm. I’m still in transition but it’s easier to see where I’m going.
- I’m actually looking forward to year 2 with the understanding that it’s an inside game. The more you embrace the challenges and make changes to support sobriety, the better it is.”