riding the elevator of booze. it only goes down.

from my inbox:

Edison (day 33): “I give you a lot of credit. You must feel like an oncologist where you know going in that you’ll have something like a 50% failure rate. Hard to care, while not getting your heartbroken I suspect.  But please know that you have made a difference with me.  No matter what happens, I got reacquainted with “Sober Edison” and we are getting along great.”

me: 🙂 dear sober edison. I go into it knowing that quitting drinking is hard work. and that people need support and tools. and that I can offer that. some people need more than support and tools. some need rehab. some need divorces. … this sober thing is hard because sometimes wolfie is too loud. other times it’s because people have been under wolfie’s spell for so long that they can’t even ‘imagine’ what feeling good would be like.

Alcohol is hard to quit. Those of us who do quit are lucky. I figure my only job is to help people to know that it’s possible. Even if they can’t yet see it for themselves. I lend them my ‘sober glasses’ that they can wear instead of their wolfie glasses…

and for those who are helped, like you, there are also the families, siblings, parents, spouses, and kids who learn to stop worrying about you. so really. one person helped probably impacts 10 or more other people. me being sober means that all of my clients have a better me, my siblings have a better me, and my husband has a better me.

I didn’t ride the elevator of booze to the bottom. I got out early. you too.

Belle

I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

  • 5 days into this and I feel for the most part, stronger and able to see why trying to “numb” my stress and pain away is a losing strategy. Didn’t seem to matter for the past 20 years, but I’m older and wiser and feel with the help of this site,(belle), I may just be on a new, great path. I know 5 days is such a short period of time, but it feels good and feels right. I am fighting some significant afternoon fatigue, but I am hoping that will pass.
    Thank you!

  • It’s worth it, thanks Belle for the many who hear your message. I appreciate reading from the newly sober, it helps me remember and to hold the hands of the WE that are continuing the journey.

  • Love this post – it’s hard to quit, and it can be done!! 327 days here and definitely inspired and helped by Belle. – Hana