from my inbox:
Davies: “Well, I have made it to Day 50 … while I am VERY proud of my sobriety, I find that I am not overly ecstatic today. I am experiencing very mixed emotions.
On the one hand, I am thrilled! I have made it 50 days without a drink. That is over twice as long as my previous stretch without a drink … The one year anniversary of a death, my birthday, my husband’s birthday, beginning the process of buying our first home, the arrival of pumpkin beer on the shelf, etc… none of these have deterred me. I am strong and determined to be sober. I have accomplished something major and I feel amazing!
However, on the other hand, I have not exercised once … Weight loss has leveled off since Day 30 and I am back to feeling overweight and gloomy. I always just assumed that when I stopped drinking the full 30 pounds of extra weight that I put on 3 years ago would just magically disappear. I guess I didn’t realize that I was going to have to work for it. I also have started smoking cigarettes again, which I am so ashamed and frustrated by. It started with one here, one there, and then ballooned to buying my own and smoking about 10-15 a day. The thing that I realized I was missing without drinking was ‘that thing to look forward to’. Well, apparently I filled that void with cigarettes.
… how I am feeling now has motivated me to add some new elements to my next 50 days. So, without further adieu, here are the goals for days 51 through 100 (and beyond…):
- No alcohol
- No smoking
- Exercise 4 times per week
- Cut out cheese from my diet (I have been a vegetarian [no meat, poultry, or seafood] all my life and about a year ago, I cut out milk, yogurt, and eggs.)
- Less breads and pastas
- More big salads for dinner at least 4 times per week (Salads are annoying to make. I hate all the chopping. As a result, my husband and I end up eating lots of pastas, rices, and other heavy foods. I LOVE eating salads… I just hate making them. Lazy, lazy, lazy!)
I am confident that I can apply those changes to my remaining 50 days and I am also confident that I will feel even healthier, prouder, and happier at the end of this challenge … Thank you for motivating me to take on this challenge!”
from me: dear sweet pea. you’re sober on day 50 and that’s a really big deal. you aren’t exercising, but so what 🙂 you’re going to be sober for awhile. you can fix stuff as you go along in your sober life. the goal in early sobriety is to be sober (and anything else that happens is bonus but not required). your life isn’t magically all fixed yet.:but you’re well underway. most people don’t lose any weight at all in the first 90-100 days. you need the treats and rewards just to deal with being sober. it’s a big thing you’ve been doing. don’t let wolfie tell you that there’s too much else to do so it’s not worth it. it is. and you are. doing it that is …
Here are your goals for day 50-100. keep doing exactly what you’ve been doing to be sober. only add other things if they feel easy and fun. if they feel like work, then wolife will come out with ‘this is all too hard’. when you’re at 100 days sober and onwards, it’ll be much easier to make other changes. for now being sober is sort of a singular focus. just for now. be kind to you 🙂 hugs from me
Davies (day 51): “Thank you for your email yesterday. I’m in a much better mood today and feeling good about all that I’ve accomplished in my 51 sober days!”
[note to self: be nicer to you. go easy. being sober is hard enough. don’t add a bunch of other expectations all at the same time. being overwhelmed makes wolfie very very excited. keep doing what you’re doing.]