post-goal letdown

i recorded a podcast this morning (and thanks to Primrose for the idea).

Maybe you’re coming up on 100 days sober, and you don’t know what to do next. You feel adrift. Goal-less. Wondering what’s the point.

This audio is about goals. And it’s about figuring shit out. This podcast will help … or it’ll make you laugh. Or both. (Or neither!)

The full length podcast is 15 minutes; here’s a 3 minute extract from the beginning. Once you listen, you can post a comment below…


click here to try a podcast subscription (1 month trial) – and of course, when you get bored of me, you can cancel whenever you want



I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

  • loved this audio (how could I not?!) The things I took home most from it were:
    – that ‘everything else is Wolfie’. The urges to drink are still Wolfie. That hasn’t changed just because I’ve gone past 100 days. Why should it? Me imagining that I can out-think him, or out-rationalise him….nope, that thought is still Wolfie talking.
    – that this let-down is NOT JUST ME. goodness, you mean I’m not SPECIAL?! that I don’t have a completely original, one-off, never-to-be-repeated-offer justification for throwing in the towel at this point? rats 🙂
    By the way Belle if you google ‘post goal let down’ your website comes up first on Google! The other websites are generally post-marathon articles. I may apply some of the same principles…I am certainly already applying Hal Higdon’s advice on post-event carb-loading 😉 One of the other articles I read also recommended focusing more on the process you underwent to achieve the goal, and recording how you felt about it, which I also found helpful – here:
    thank you so much, Belle! xxx

  • Sober Learning Day 16.
    I’m not finding it hard and I know that goes against what Belle says. It’s funny but I have a booze on/off switch and when I flip it to the “off” setting I am fine. Having said that this is the longest I’ve gone drink-free for a quite some time and it’s definitely re-introduced me to a world without alcohol and I’m grateful.
    Among the reflecting I’ve done(and there’s been a lot) I recently had the realization that I have no trouble not drinking but I have a lot of trouble not drinking a lot.
    Not drinking? No problem. Not drinking a lot?- Big problem. And therein lies the issue with my imbibing. I have no governor any more and that’s a scary thing to confront…
    16 days has given me space and time and a lot to think about and I’m already getting my head around day 101 and new goals to be set.
    I really don’t need a whole lot more “alcohol research” to tell me what I already know.
    Best always

    • howard, i’m the same. being sober is much easier than moderation. once i had one drink, all bets were off… it’s just plain easier to have none.

      • one drink is too many, a thousand is not enough … once I take the first drink … all bets are off, it’s roulette … where the drinking goes nobody knows …

  • I have seen on a few blogs that you have a 180 day challenge, is that so? I haven’t seen it anywhere on your blog.
    I think at 100 days, I am just going to keep on keeping on.
    Continue to attend AA, maybe get a sponsor, and work daily to not pour myself into a bottle (or two) of wine.
    I have many rivers to cross.

    Many rivers to cross
    And it’s only my will that keeps me alive
    I’ve been licked, washed up for years
    And I merely survive because of my pride

    Jimmy Cliff

  • Brilliant. I love that idea of going to do “alcohol research” after 100 days. At first I was thinking “what’s that?”, then I realised it was choosing to go and investigate booze by drinking again. I love the image of doing research into why I quit booze in the first place. And right now the love remains with the image, I don’t actually want to do it.

    This is a great topic as even though I’m on day 38 (I think) I get pangs of anxiety about what to do as 100 rolls around. Knowing I can choose another goal eases the anxiety. Plus I remember the anxiety is a good reminder from my body that it doesn’t want to drink!

    • you know tom, i think you’re right. whenever i’m feeling anxious about a lack-of-goal, it means that having a goal is where I should be! we’re never adrift for long, and we don’t have to be adrift at all. since we’re driving this sober car of ours, we get to decide where we’re going … no need to pull off the road for research (we’ve tried that before!) because getting back into sobriety can be super tough (or take too long or be too hard or really suck and be depressing) … not sure what to do? drinking isn’t the answer : )


      belle xo