help. super bowl party

Beach Gurl (day 66): “Help. Having Super Bowl party at my house! The real me does NOT WANT TO DRINK! Wolfie has called in his pack and they are all howling at me! Shut the FUCK UP! I can do this! Party starts in 2 hours… If you get this… I could use an encouraging word to blast wolfie and pack between their eyes!
Ps… Made me feel a little stronger just writing this!”

me: “here’s the truth: wolfie is just a noise, it’s not a command or a demand. it’s not a ‘must act upon’. wolfie is a thought, and a voice, and whining three year old crying for a donut.

we do not give children donuts to shut them up. We say very calmly: no donuts now.  maybe later, but definitely not now. Then we send them to their rooms. we occasional give them a spank on the bum when necessary. And this may be one of those times.

Instead, you say to wolfie: “I’m having diet lemonade and tonic and grapefruit juice and tea. I’m going to pour myself four different drinks in four different glasses.  And then I’m going to drink them … because the boozer in me hates to let things go to ‘waste’ and I’ll hate to waste the 4 non-alcoholic drinks. fuck you wolfie.”

love, me


Rebecca: “Writing and asking for help can make it easier.  Good on you for doing that.  So can taking a walk to get some air (its just so hot with all these people! ) or running to the store for something. And maybe on the way back stop for a coffee n take your time getting back. There’s always saying you feel kinda icky n just need to turn in early.  No one can question that.  You can do this girl! Make sure you’ve got some yummy drinks on hand.  And treats!”


I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

  • I am so incredibly proud of all of you for getting thru this most difficult of days. Super Bowl is not kind to the soberistas in the country; however, we did it and we are stronger for the effort. Tomorrow we will feel good about our decisions today. Today we feel good about our decisions today. We rock !~! We had a quiet day at home with lots of Cran-Grape juice, water and a cuppa.

    Cheers to all. Happy February.

    • I’m here in Seattle too, Katiebelle! Wasn’t it surreal?! (Sorry Bronco fans, but we really needed this more than you know.)

  • Congrats! Beachgurl! I am still at work so I didn’t have any parties to worry about. I do have to say, however, in defense of my experiences with AA, that I did develop a circle of sober friends that are always up for a party that always does not include alcohol. Unfortunately, I always drank when I left, but not any more! I am doing this this time truly for me! Fuck the Wolf!

  • Congratulations beach girl ! I hosted a superbowl party too…. funny how thinking about it is the worst part. Actually being sober isn’t as bad as anticipating being sober at an event. I have had many days like you describe… drinking way too much and hating myself the next day. I am done with that. Life is too short to feel shame and embarrassment all the time. I’m so proud of all of us who make it through these events triumphant! Think of all we can do !!!! it is awesome

  • Oh my goodness!!! Thank you so much each and everyone of you!!!i did it!!! Neighbors all just left because of shitty game!!!!( thanks Seahawks). After emailing belle and Rebecca I got some dark chocolate out of the freezer and told hubby to take a blue pill(sorry, TMI?)both did wonders… In hindsight, it was the first social event I’ve hosted being sober. The anticipatory anxiety was much worse then the. Actual event!!!!! Once everyone arrived, I made myself busy with food and such and had my big cold cup of cranberry and lime!!!!!
    Last year, I got so shit face on wine that I actually for the first time in my life called in sick to work while I was wasted at 2 in the morning.. .. I hated myself the next day ……. Guess what?????? No more hating myself because of the wine wolfie son of a bitch!!!!!! I did it…… With ALLL OF YOUR HELP!!!!!!! Thank you so much!
    66 days ago, I didn’t even know this wonderful sober encouraging blog world was out there!!!! We all can do it with support!!!!! Wool hoo! Hugs!

    • So proud of all of us for making it through the anticipation and the event, sharing our tools.

      For those of us who had s struggle day or someone who has to reset their days, it’s okay too. It’s never too late to try and dehydrate the wolf.



  • Stare the bastard down. Wolfie is the voice of an old habit and you are creating new ones. Eat what you want, keep your n/a beverage of choice to hand. You can do this!

  • Get mad, really mad at the voice, the wolf that’s trying to bring you down. Tell him no fucking way. You’re stronger than him. Show him! You don’t want to start over. Day Ones suck remember.

  • YOU ARE NOT ALONE … there are millions of us choosing to not drink during Super Bowl, and Wolfie is full of chit telling you that you are the only one missing out, not drinking, not having a good time. You are missing out on guilt, regret, hangover, alcohol talk, alcohol behavior, remorse, bad sleep, and you are gaining confidence that one Super Bowl at a time you are holding hands with each of US who are also NOT DRINKING during this Super Bowl. Eat dookie Wolfie and get back in your cave! We’re having SOBER FUN HERE, drinking special non alcoholic drinks and eating yummy food and did I mention SWEETS …. RIP Phillip Seymour Hoffman, wolfie claims another victory stealing a great talent.

    • I love the idea that we are holding hands, supporting each other. I definitely feel like that every day that I visit this blog. Taking time for myself to read Belle’s posts and your comments are a part of my daily treat. I am on day 7 after a horrendous reset last week, but I made it through a party at my house yesterday too. Thanks Team Sober. Love you guys!!!

  • I agree, fill up your plate with yummy snacks and do not let your n/a drink of choice get empty. I’ve had 6 or more cran and sodas in this situation! It’s all going to be okay, and I promise you’ll feel so much better and hydrated later. I’m going to a Super Bowl party myself and plan to stuff my face with no guilt whatsoever. I’m rooting for you!

  • My best defense when I go to or host events that really make me want to join in with the drinkers is to eat whatever I want…and plenty of it. First, being really full helps kill the cravings, and second, I get to enjoy that naughty feeling of breaking the rules without having a pounding hangover the next day and the HUGE regret that I would feel if I let Wolfie win. And it keeps me from feeling deprived. This probably only works for someone who loves chocolate second only to wine, but you might give it a try. Remember, you only have to fight that son-of-a-bitch for a few more hours today, and tomorrow when you wake up, he’ll be gone and you’ll have another day ahead of you with a clear brain and that feeling that you can conquer anything.

  • I am going through the same thing. Going to a Super Bowl party too. Just drove home from the store and shouted fuck you wolfie in the car all the way home. Hopped on the blog to get control back. Know that I won’t like myself tomorrow if I fail. A pledge is a pledge right beachgurl ?

  • Move to England … Actually we’ve got the 6 nations rugby. So. Eat plenty ignore any diet. Make sure you have a big supply of your drink of choice lemonade or whatever guard it my kids used to nick mine and keep gold of that. Good luck.

  • BeachGurl – You will so feel amazing inner strength when you get through it with Wolfie silenced. Put him in the trash all night long, if necessary. throw a napkin away and let it be Wolfie. Tomorrow you will be so empowered by your own actions. I don’t know if it helps to think of that, but its something. Having the party at your house is certainly tougher, but also easier because you can prepare your own snacks and drinks. Tea, is always good – warm cup in hands to hold on to 🙂 Best!

  • Hey you can get through, take a break from the party when you need it. Go in your room and take deep breaths, drink plenty of water before the party so you are hydrated. If someone asks you why you are not drinking, have a reason, antibiotics, have to drive someone home later, need to get up super early for work tomorrow, whatever it takes.
    If someone gives you a hard time, give it right back to them. I had someone over and over again trying to get me to drink wine one night at around day 30, I finally said if you were on a diet I wouldn’t try to shove cake down your throat so don’t
    try to shove wine down my throat.
    Your reaching out is a sure sign of your commitment!

  • How about a nice roses lime juice & tonic with lots of crushed ice, then maybe a dove dark chocolate piece! Yummy. Fuck u Wolfie

  • So glad you hopped on the blogs. I’m facing the same challenge at day 29. I just left the grocer, I literally have 4 types of drinks that are non alcoholic and did I mention cupcakes? You can do this !! Wolfie can be a beyotch and he attacks during the anticipation of the event the hardest! One hour at a time 😉