Happy 100 days and Happy 100 days

Happy 100 days to Bizi

Bizi: “Dear Belle, I had been a lurker before I started the challenge… when we had our last [vacation] I started. I knew that there were not any vacations nor holidays for the 100 days. So I took the plunge and started counting days of Alcohol free. I had never gone that long with out a drink, I have differing lengths of abstinence over the last 3 years, month here a month there. 90 days once last year. But this is the first time that I made it 100 days. So for this I say thank you Belle for supporting me. It made it easy to not drink when I finally let go of all of the drama and said that *I don’t drink anymore*. Period.”

Happy 100 days to Julz!

Julz: “100 days done and dusted -yay me!!! – bring on challenge 180!

How I felt 100 days ago: desperate, sad, knackered, tired – oh so tired, tired of being tired, tired of being a half hearted mother with nil energy for my two beautiful children, grumpy with my children, grumpy with my husband, doing a rubbish job at work, horrid in every aspect of my life.

How I felt a week or so in to the challenge: knackered, tired, grumpy, but…….. Hopeful, proud

How I felt half way through the challenge: still tired and like a chocolate addict, but….. Happy, energy boosted, proud.

How I feel now: still like a chocolate addict but….. Happy, energy boosted, like a good mum, I have time and energy for my two beautiful babies, I am watching them flourish before my eyes, they talk to me, they have fun with me, yes I occasionally go mad, but these are NORMAL mummy moments NOT hungover ones, I am doing a good job at work, i am being a good wife, I am sooooooo proud of myself, I am sooooooo happy.

Does wolfie a still talk to me? Yes, occasionally, but rarely and when he does I give him a quick flick and he’s gone, I know it might not always be like this and I know times could still get tough but right now life it good, I’m good, I’m better than good — I’m alive!”

From me:

I am fine. I am not working too hard. I am not overwhelmed. I am not someone to worry about (at least not this week!). I am having a very slack period in catering and I’m happy for that. i could use some magic to help me sleep soundly at night, but i fear that at nearly 47 years old, that skill isn’t going to be mine. i have other talents. being a sound sleeper isn’t one of them. and since i no longer self-medicate with wine or cold medicine, i’m just … sleepless in europe this week. This weekend i hope to get back to running more regularly and i’m sure that’ll help.

i’m also old y’all. and may need some … hormones.

Fuckers.

Like my sleep wasn’t already fucked up enough. honestly. the injustice of it all. can’t i have nice hair AND sleep soundly through the night? No? fine. i’ll keep the nice hair and just DEAL. but i will whine about it. to an audience. you’ll see.