saturdays might be tough, but …

weekends present special challenges. all this free time. the gaping space that needs to be filled. i would often start drinking at about 3 pm, and that would pretty much take care of the rest of the day. now that i’m not drinking, i sometimes find myself doing things that i never would have done before. Like going for groceries in the evening. Never would have done that!

And since Saturdays can be tough, I thought we could make a list of all the things that we do now, sober, that we never would have done if we were drinking. Physical, actual things that we do. Not just feelings that we have, but what are we getting done…

You can post a comment below, or send me an email. What do you do now with all your spare time?

Lynda (day 40): doing laundry at 9:30 pm and waiting up for it to dry because I need clothes for the morning.  Answering the phone at 9:45 pm and being able to accept a work assignment and be able to remember it and look forward to it.  Taking my dog for a walk later in the evening because I want to. Offering to drive a friend home after midnight … Volunteering at our playhouse theater and driving home after the late shift and enjoying the full moon while waving to the cop at the side of the road, knowing if he pulled me over it wouldn’t be an issue.

Leigh Ann (2): girly self-care stuff (nails, facial, etc.)

Heidi (8): I get to bathe my children and tuck them both into bed. I would be missing that if I was drunk … all is right in my world. That’s amazing. Kiss my ass you damn wolf!

The biggest difference for me, now, is I’m in the kitchen more than before. I plan meals, i buy groceries, and then i actually make meals. I find ways to use up leftovers. We hardly ever go out to eat in a restaurant any more (bye-bye to all the ridiculously large restaurant bills, which were always 75% alcohol).

What about you? What physical things are you doing now that you weren’t doing before, that now fill your time, fill the space where booze was before? Everyone who finds Saturdays long/hard wants to know what you think 🙂

Oh, and apparently it was day 300 for me yesterday? i was too busy to notice! DDG is on day 40, and Mr. Lynda is also on day 40! Welcome to new members: Kirst (2), Laura (4), Debra (day 90 today!).


I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

  • Day 303 for me today. I like reading the parts in the blog that match nearly to the same day I’m on! Strange how different my life is to this but in actual fact the thought processes are familiar- especially the bit in the day above which talks about “what have I learned from this and why did it happen “ I’m always wanting to work it out ; to find some meaning or purpose especially when something difficult occurs, involving pain. But like here, it’s usually a case of getting through it and realising that drinking will just make it all worse.
    As for Saturdays and the gaping hole of time; I’m pretty good at filling that with watching stuff on the iPad or actually just spending time with my kids and hubby. Being there rather than blotto. Ready to respond to them ; actually taking the place in my life that I’d wanted to avoid.
    It’s all good even if at times uncomfortable. It’s certainly living that’s for sure and I think that’s got to be win win…
    Thanks for this blog Belle- it’s like a timeline to follow 👍❤️

  • I’m only on day 25, so mostly I’m still reading A LOT of sober stuff, … and giving myself a hard time for not doing more ‘other things’, and then reminding myself – and being reminded by Belle – that it’s early days and to STOP beating myself up 🙂

  • Take up running. Love yourself in cool day glo Lycra… So you can get cut enough to run after the new puppy you decide to get -to use all that free time now you’re sober

  • SD: I plant flowers and read books, whole entire books, and go to church at 5:30 or 7:30 pm and hit the early morning farmers market and buy myself gigantic bouquets that cost less than one bottle of wine.

  • Liberte: ) Read great books. \ Laugh a lot more late into the night. \ Talk to my HUSBAND. \ Watch shows that are interesting and DON’T fall asleep during them! \ Go to a 3 day yoga retreat and don’t even THINK ONCE AT ALL about wine (that wasn’t present). \ Told a girl at above retreat who admitted fighting an addiction about my BFF Belle. \Go to the store or mall if I get the urge. \ Plan fabulous menus for the upcoming weekend. \ Take a good nighttime walk! \ Lie around and do whatever I want w/o Wolfie jabbering in my ear!!! \ Take an evening class that would’ve been out of the question. (Don’t really like leaving after dark unless it’s really worth it!) \ Text my BFFs and pontificate intelligently and hilariously to my/our heart’s content! \ Sleep like a queen who is happy and fulfilled! \ Make late night brownies/cookies and eat the dough. (Did that w/ wine as well, but I don’t do it as much now. Interesting!) \ Look in mirror and notice my skin looks better and clearer and younger (at 62).

  • Gra: i am always able to go wherever I want whenever I want / I have beautiful restorative sleep \ I garden \ I exercise \ I socialise still, and drive there and leave when I want \ I can really love listen \ I can really connect \ I can really laugh \ I have grown up (a little) \ I am happier \ I can call it a day, rather than flog whatever it is to death \ I can call it, period, I am braver and clearer than I have ever been before \ I am still lazy about housework \ I still procrastinate , but I know that and i can get my arse in gear and get moving because there are no excuses anymore! \ I am more creative \ I am happier \ I look better \ I like myself \ I don’t waste any time hating myself!!! \ I am an nice person!!! \ I like me!

  • Summer Walking: catch up with friends for a Chai latte and go out for lunch; clean out cupboards; cooking new recipes; going for walks; going shopping; read a book; sewing; night hikes, go places later in the day (couldn’t before because over .05 to drive), head out for days in the city.
    One weekend I had (a date weekend) where I did just exactly what I felt like – hair done, lunch with children, walk in the gardens, did some cooking just wonderful mundane stuff, but only what I felt like.

  • Mitten: What do I do with my time on weekends now that I’m sober? Clean the house after I get home from work so it’s a clean start for Monday / Read, read, read / Go out for dessert with friends…and am the driver!! / Waste time on the Internet (something’s never change!) / Prep food for the next week / Go for a run / Watch tv and remember what I’ve seen the next day…
    I LOVE my sober weekends!

  • I train clients.
    Pre-cook meals for the week.
    Clean my house (because that may be my ONLY chance to do it this week).
    Make homemade almond butter so I can use dark chocolate as a vessel to get it in my mouth!
    Program exercise circuits for my clients.
    Enjoy the quiet down time to reenergize for the week.
    I’m also amazed at how little TV fits in my schedule these days…I watch only what and when I feel like it’s not wasting my time. I’d rather be DOING something!

  • The other night, I went to the gym at 8:30pm. It was AWESOME! No one else was there, I had a great workout, sauna…loved it. Tonight (after a long drive home from a work thing for the day) I read. As in a book. And had some creative, productive thoughts toward my writing. Now it’s midnight and I’m going to sleep – SOBER! I love it (Ellen, day 11)

  • I’ve baked bread at 10.30pm on a Saturday!
    Laundry and running guests to the train.
    Kissing my kids when they are dreaming and remembering how cute they look and best of all, remembering the tooth Fairy!!
    Happy Sober Saturday to all of you!

  • OK, but really, I also:

    sit outside
    watch bad tv
    check my Facebook
    write emails
    cherish my children
    go to bed early
    maybe eat more….

  • to be fair, Amy also says: “The more I think about it, the more I know that booze sucks ass. And I don’t. Therefore booze and I have nothing in common. And cannot be friends.”

  • Marie says: “One thing I know that I did [sober] that I would not have [done while drinking] is that I went to the garden store … to get mulch, stones, plants, and moved them all myself. I saw the entire project through, and planted everything, plus laid the stones and mulch. I worked from the crack of dawn until it got dark out and have not accomplished that much in one day in such a long time. I am the type of person that yearns to work THAT HARD, but with booze, I [was] just so limited … and I’ve got a couple of kayaks in the garage that haven’t seen the water in way too long. Today might just be the day!”

  • I like cooking in the evening. When I was drinking I could never be bothered to cook – food would always be a takeaway. I’ve also found that going to the gym at 5.30pm is good as it keeps me busy around wine o’clock. As everyone else said, the ability to actually do stuff like write coherent emails late into the evening is also pretty great!

  • I had become completely physically dependent on alcohol so basically I was unable to do anything without a bolstering shot of booze to still the hands and calm the nerves. I couldn’t do anything and now I can do anything. That pretty well sums it up.

  • Friday and Saturday nights were the hardest in early sobriety! I was SO bored without my wine. Wine was my entertainment or my best friend (which is so sad). I’ve heard lots of you say this very same thing.
    So now I am able to pick up my kids from their friends houses sober, watch a dvd movie with hubby and remember it or not fall asleep half way thru it, bake something sweet for dessert, read a book, make a spontaneous ice cream run at 10pm with the kids and dog, go out on a date with hubby and enjoy our time without wine (so much cheaper)!
    I look forward to the summer months and going out for long walks in the cool evenings and sitting around the fire pit making smores and going to free weekly local concerts at parks and gardening til dark. Just keeping busy or curling up with a blanket helped me! Guilt free/hang over free Saturday’s and Sunday’s were/are pretty awesome too. 🙂