Monday Celebration Roundup

Happy Day 50 to LateTrier

Happy Day 50 to HatTrick!

Happy Day 50 to Jaded!

Happy Day 50 to SeeLizSkip!

Happy Day 50 to Lotus Lady!

Happy Day 50 to DaFroDoctor!

Happy Day 50 to Stargirl!

Happy Day 50 to MindfulMe!

Happy Day 50 to Janey!

Happy Day 50 to Ina!

Happy Day 50 to Ismael!

Happy Day 50 to Kay!

Happy Day 50 to Shel!

Happy Day 50 to Mamabird!

Happy Day 100 to Sobersusie!

Happy Day 100 to SG!

Happy Day 100 to Katrinka!

Happy Day 100 to Hidcote!

Happy Day 100 to J12!

Happy Day 100 to LiquidTracy!

Happy Day 100 to Bean7!

Happy Day 100 to Trigirl!

Happy Day 100 to Rehc!

Happy Day 100 to Sadie2015!

Happy Day 100 to vstuart!

Happy Day 100 to RainyPNW!

Happy Day 100 to NMD!

Happy Day 100 to Kathyb!

Happy Day 100 to Nell!

Happy Day 100 to Satnley!

Happy Day 100 to Leener!

Happy Day 100 to Smokey!

Happy Day 180 to LD4ME!

Happy Day 180 to Mlodius!

Happy Day 180 to Frog!

Happy Day 180 to MiMoMa!

Happy Day 180 to Lars!

Happy Day 200 to Flyaway!

Happy Day 200 to Dry Ace!

Happy Day 200 to Sober Tea!

Happy Day 200 to Mich2point0!

Happy Day 200 to Leila!

Happy Day 200 to Maggie Mo!

Happy Day 200 to Lmichel!

Happy Day 300 to Karebear!

Happy Day 300 to Myriam!

Happy Day 300 to Goldie!

Happy Day 300 to Newg!

Happy Day 300 to Leigh Ann!

Happy Day 300 to Alicat!

Happy Day 300 to RossFSU!

Happy Day 365 to RetiringPartyGirl!

Happy Day 365 to Stefanie!

Happy Day 365 to IngridandMac!

Happy Day 365 to Peewit!

Happy Day 365 to Lavender!

Happy Day 365 to Gina!

Happy Day 365 to Gomez!

Happy Day 365 to Mummabear!

Happy Day 365 to Wanda T!

Happy Day 365 to GK!

Happy Day 365 to Franci!

Happy Day 365 to Loz!

Happy Day 365 to Buttercup244!

Happy Day 365 to SoberinVA!

Happy Day 365 to Jaylee!

Happy Day 365 to MrsRoberts!

Happy Day 365 to Lizzytish!

Happy Day 365 to Peaceable J!

Happy Day 365 to Mindful Monica!

Happy Day 400 to SarahJune31!

Happy Day 400 to LimeTree!

Happy Day 400 to SophieStar!

Happy Day 400 to Jazzie!

Happy Day 400 to Missmeliss!

Happy Day 400 to Gem64!

Happy Day 400 to Bruna!

Happy Day 400 to Princess Buttercup!

Happy Day 400 to Nowinemom!

Happy Day 400 to SueW!

Happy Day 400 to Roadtosoberville!

Happy Day 400 to KiKi71!

Happy Day 400 to Honey Bear!

Happy Day 400 to Resilensea!

Happy Day 500 to Gene!

Happy Day 500 to Lola4126!

Happy Day 500 to TJS!

Happy Day 500 to Ruby Harper!

Happy Day 500 to Poppy!

Happy Day 500 to Topo Chico!

Happy Day 500 to Ruby!

Happy Day 500 to Hollm!

Happy Day 500 to Reg!

Happy Day 500 to Bemmy Girl!

Happy Day 500 to Battle Matt!

Happy Day 500 to Maverick!

Happy Day 500 to April!

Happy Day 600 to Rogueyogi!

Happy Day 600 to Dry Ginger!

Happy Day 600 to Miss Kell!

Happy Day 600 to Reenie!

Happy Day 600 to Imara!

Happy Day 600 to Conn!

Happy Day 700 to Auds!

Happy Day 700 to KaffyB!

Happy Day 700 to Debbie!

Happy Day 700 to KLC!

Happy Day 700 to Country pat!

Happy Day 700 to Lanza!

Happy Day 700 to Chell!

Happy Day 700 to Joziegurrl!

Happy Day 700 to Franny!

Happy Day 700 to Husband #1!

Happy Day 800 to KAB!

Happy Day 800 to Hughie!

Happy Day 800 to JP!

Happy Day 800 to Thirsty Iris!

Happy Day 800 to Gypsygirl!

Happy Day 900 to Cal!

Happy Day 900 to Gordon!

Happy Day 900 to Unwinedgal!

Happy Day 900 to Meraki!

Happy Day 1000 to Grateful Girl!

Happy Day 1000 to Jenuhful!

Happy Day 1000 to cheaton!

Happy Day 1000 to tk!

Happy Day 1100 to LJ63!

Happy Day 1100 to Sean!

Happy Day 1100 to Indian Lake!

Happy Day 1100 to Mel P!

Happy Day 1100 to Solstice Guy!

Happy Day 1100 to Summer Walking!

Happy Day 1100 to Turncotte!

Happy Day 1100 to Southern Magnola1013!

Happy Day 1200 to Canadian Girl!

Happy Day 1200 to GG!

Happy Day 1200 to Festie!

Happy Day 1200 to Graceb!

Happy Day 1200 to Paris!

Happy Day 1200 to Shout444!

Happy Day 1200 to Midwestveggie!

Happy Day 1200 to Rah!

Happy Day 1200 to RoseMarie!

Happy Day 1200 to Janna!

Happy Day 1200 to Jacqui!

Happy Day 1200 to Kelz!

Happy Day 1300 to Megan!

Happy Day 1300 to Lara!

Happy Day 1300 to Sharlotte!

Happy Day 1300 to Mizgabiz!

Happy Day 1300 to Sanfransober!

Happy Day 1300 to Sarah72!

Happy Day 1300 to CassieB!

Happy Day 1300 to Roisin!

Happy Day 1300 to Shelby!

Happy Day 1300 to Weenie!

Happy Day 1400 to OtherJosh!

Happy Day 1400 to RunnerMom!

Happy Day 1400 to Jlynn!

Happy Day 1400 to Julie-Joy’s Dad!

Happy Day 1400 to Jessi!

Happy Day 1400 to Heike!

Happy Day 1400 to Isabel!

Happy Day 1400 to Daybird!

Happy Day 1400 to Allison!

Happy Day 1400 to LolaB!

Happy Day 1400 to Connie!

Happy Day 1400 to Fich!

Happy Day 1400 to Hank!

Happy Day 1400 to Ashae!

Happy Day 1400 to Emery!

Happy Day 1500 to Nuchter Maya!

Happy Day 1500 to Janet!

Happy Day 1500 to Denise!

Happy Day 1500 to TheFun4!

Happy Day 1500 to Terence!

Happy Day 1500 to Clear Eyed Girl!

Happy Day 1500 to Hazleyes!

Happy Day 1500 to Case Study Tim!

Happy Day 1500 to Baby Girl Butterfly!

Happy Day 1500 to Primrose!

Happy Day 1500 to Sadie!

Happy Day 1500 to SignGurl!

Happy Day 1500 to Jeannie Yogini!

Happy Day 1600 to Jen is the soberist!

Happy Day 1600 to Sharon!

Happy Day 1600 to LD!

Happy Day 1600 to Laurie!

Happy Day 1700 to Original Beth!

Happy Day 1700 to Leah!

Happy Day 1800 to Amy!

Happy Day 2018 to me!

 

when i don’t drink, i feel better about me

written at 9:30 a.m. local time

today i’m proud of myself. it’s silent, early morning, up before most of the locals on a holiday. the upstairs neighbours are away. quiet. i can actually hear birds, it’s like the shortest day of the year has really passed, and we’re into something new.

it’s not raining. it’s warmer than seasonal which is a gift. my husband who has been sick since the day before the vacation started, is still in bed, still sick. man flu + coughing so much you throw out your back. yes, that’s him. but right now, he’s quiet too, and asleep. when i tell him he doesn’t cough when sleeping, he doesn’t find this curious. i do.

my emotions are in charge of everything i do. if i feel frisky, i make bread and do the dishes. if i feel slighted, i sulk and listen to business podcasts with both earphones in, sorry, can’t hear you. when i like my life, i make dinner. when i’m a slug, we have frozen meals from the frozen-meal-store, which is actually quite good, compared to north american standards. it’s not lean cuisine. it’s actual food. just frozen.

if i feel proud of myself, i keep doing the same things that make me feel good.

and as this new year unfolds, unspools, like a roll of film in front of me, i get to pick where i walk. i decide how many days i go outside (i work from home!). how many times i make dinner. how many times i drink juice. i get to decide whether i want to write a sober fiction book. i get to decide if i learn new things. if i play video games. if i sit in the bathtub.

you’re the writer of this new film, the one called “Me 2018.” you’re also the actor, the stage director, and the costumer. you get to decide what to wear, today i;m here in my plaid pj bottoms and my sober fuzzy socks. i get to choose between all-butter croissants or ‘croissants ordinaires‘ (never pick the latter).

i get to reach out for tools and supports that make me feel better about my life. i remember that how i think about things changes them. the rainy sidewalk becomes shiny with reflected light when i’m in the right mood, and can also be sludgy black and dark on another day. i pick the shiny. i pick the 80% that’s good. there’s something going on right now in your life, in mine, that sucks anus rocks. I’m not discounting my shittiness. i’m focussing on the good parts. and on the parts that i can control. starting with how i feel about me.

and when i don’t drink, i feel better about me. so i’m going to continue doing that.

happy new you 🙂

==

Comments from advance readers:

Jazzie (day 401): “And you inspire me!! … You’ve given me a new way to look at things and life though I’ve thought this was before, your way makes more sense to me. Thank you Belle. Happy New Year!!!”

Flyaway (day 192): “Before your blog I never thought about ‘changing perspectives’ or ‘reframing thoughts’. These tools have changed my life. I’m excited for this new year! Thank you for inspiring me!


~ and welcome to everyone who has found me through Catherine Gray … she’s penpal #270 and is on day 1570 today!


Would you like a sober penpal for a year?

Sober Jumpstart class re-opens today
with a limit of 11 available spots
Today
Monday January 1st
www.soberjumpstart.com

 

Friday Celebration Roundup

Happy Day 50 to Elated, Confident & Peaceful!

Happy Day 50 to Cellocat!

Happy Day 50 to Fatgit!

Happy Day 50 to Sobersusie!

Happy Day 50 to SG!

Happy Day 50 to Katrinka!

Happy Day 50 to Hidcote!

Happy Day 50 to Happy Day 50 to MisMay!

Happy Day 50 to Happy Day 50 to Trishy!

Happy Day 50 to J12!

Happy Day 50 to Liquid Tracy!

Happy Day 100 to Sobe the Lion!

Happy Day 100 to MelMel!

Happy Day 100 to Octa!

Happy Day 100 to Wafflehousemomma!

Happy Day 100 to Peppercorn!

Happy Day 100 to Springer!

Happy Day 100 to Debbi Does Sober!

Happy Day 100 to Lordi!

Happy Day 180 to Maggie Mo!

Happy Day 180 to Annikki!

Happy Day 180 to Lmichel!

Happy Day 200 to LinZeeLou!

Happy Day 200 to BalanceBeam!

Happy Day 200 to BirdSetFree!

Happy Day 200 to Mia!

Happy Day 200 to Hallacious!

Happy Day 200 to Sobriety Unlocked!

Happy Day 300 to 35&changing!

Happy Day 300 to Jacci2!

Happy Day 300 to Honeybadger!

Happy Day 300 to Sobersparkles!

Happy Day 300 to MrsWooly!

Happy Day 300 to NatureNancy!

Happy Day 300 to RedRedWine!

Happy Day 300 to Aimee!

Happy Day 300 to Kaycee!

Happy Day 300 to Blou!

Happy Day 365 to Lime Tree!

Happy Day 365 to Wynn!

Happy Day 365 to Sophiestar!

Happy Day 365 to Jazzie!

Happy Day 365 to Mismeliss!

Happy Day 365 to Gem64!

Happy Day 365 to Bruna!

Happy Day 365 to Princess Buttercup!

Happy Day 365 to Nowinemom!

Happy Day 365 to SueW!

Happy Day 365 to Roadtosoberville!

Happy Day 400 to Stillbridge!

Happy Day 400 to True.d.true!

Happy Day 400 to Becca1978!

Happy Day 400 to Blondie!

Happy Day 400 to Jamie-Tampa!

Happy Day 400 to Capt. Unwined!

Happy Day 400 to Tiger2017!

Happy Day 500 to Froggy Google!

Happy Day 500 to unduped!

Happy Day 500 to Frupa63!

Happy Day 500 to Tsilver!

Happy Day 500 to vmd free!

Happy Day 500 to Lippy!

Happy Day 500 to Tierrazul!

Happy Day 500 to Nomobsing!

Happy Day 600 to KatieMay!

Happy Day 600 to Clearlee!

Happy Day 600 to Patten!

Happy Day 700 to TJ!

Happy Day 700 to Binkles!

Happy Day 700 to Elis!

Happy Day 700 to Lydster!

Happy Day 700 to TrixieK!

Happy Day 700 to Fern!

Happy Day 700 to Coco!

Happy Day 800 to Tree!

Happy Day 800 to Lucia!

Happy Day 800 to Juliejean123!

Happy Day 800 to Ami!

Happy Day 900 to Meraki!

Happy Day 900 to Heya Monster!

Happy Day 900 to Shorttermnoterm!

Happy Day 900 to AnnieB!

Happy Day 900 to Whitbell25!

Happy Day 900 to Ginette!

Happy Day 900 to Lilac!

Happy Day 1000 to Oz!

Happy Day 1000 to Julie-Joy’s Sister!

Happy Day 1000 to Faye858!

Happy Day 1000 to Me-fixing-me!

Happy Day 1000 to mythreesons!

Happy Day 1000 to gingerade!

Happy Day 1000 to Honner!

Happy Day 1100 to Maureen!

Happy Day 1100 to Library Girl!

Happy Day 1100 to Joannie!

Happy Day 1100 to Chace!

Happy Day 1200 to Petunia!

Happy Day 1200 to Dancing Rabbit!

Happy Day 1200 to Microlady!

Happy Day 1200 to AlexP!

Happy Day 1200 to Chefstarr!

Happy Day 1200 to Monique!

Happy Day 1200 to iphonebonnie!

Happy Day 1200 to Chachi!

Happy Day 1200 to nomorepinot!

Happy Day 1300 to 1111!

Happy Day 1300 to Manda!

Happy Day 1300 to Sober Lemon!

Happy Day 1300 to PP!

Happy Day 1300 to Foxie!

Happy Day 1300 to Battersea Park!

Happy Day 1300 to Welles!

Happy Day 1300 to Gra!

Happy Day 1300 to SusieQ!

Happy Day 1300 to IrishDee!

Happy Day 1400 to Going2pieces!

Happy Day 1400 to Apprentice SoberP!

Happy Day 1400 to Blake!

Happy Day 1400 to DeeN!

Happy Day 1400 to Moore!

Happy Day 1400 to FitFatFood!

Happy Day 1400 to Crispy!

Happy Day 1500 to Jilly Bean!

Happy Day 1500 to Kirst!

Happy Day 1500 to Mylene!

Happy Day 1500 to InNeedOfGrace!

Happy Day 1600 to Durf11!

Happy Day 1700 to Sober Journalist Kate!

Happy Day 1700 to JM!

Happy Day 1700 to Rebecca!

Happy Day 1700 to Digs!

Happy Day 1700 to Carrie!

Happy Day 1800 to Amy!

Happy Day 1980 to me !

Happy Day 2000 to thirteenpointone!

Wednesday Celebration Roundup

Happy Day 50 to GaGalGoingDry!

Happy Day 50 to Krisdee!

Happy Day 50 to Ariel!

Happy Day 50 to Trigirl!

Happy Day 50 to Fridgkit!

Happy Day 50 to Rehc!

Happy Day 50 to Sadie2015!

Happy Day 50 to vstuart!

Happy Day 50 to Strider!

Happy Day 50 to RainyPNW!

Happy Day 50 to NMD!

Happy Day 50 to Nell!

Happy Day 50 to Kathyb!

Happy Day 50 to LizzieB!

Happy Day 100 to Ket!

Happy Day 100 to Celine!

Happy Day 100 to LateTrier!

Happy Day 100 to SoberSass!

Happy Day 100 to LJC!

Happy Day 180 to LinLeeLou!

Happy Day 180 to Kimpossible!

Happy Day 180 to BalanceBeam!

Happy Day 180 to BirdSetFree!

Happy Day 180 to Mia!

Happy Day 180 to Hellacious!

Happy Day 180 to Sobriety Unlocked!

Happy Day 200 to Arya!

Happy Day 200 to SDBkatz!

Happy Day 200 to Auntiemame!

Happy Day 300 to Retiring Party Girl!

Happy Day 300 to Bridget!

Happy Day 300 to Stefanie!

Happy Day 300 to Ingridandmac!

Happy Day 300 to Peewit!

Happy Day 300 to Lavender!

Happy Day 300 to Gina!

Happy Day 300 to Helen!

Happy Day 300 to Gomez!

Happy Day 300 to Mummabear!

Happy Day 300 to Wanda T!

Happy Day 300 to LOL!

Happy Day 300 to GK!

Happy Day 300 to Franci!

Happy Day 300 to Loz!

Happy Day 300 to Buttercup244!

Happy Day 365 to KiKi71!

Happy Day 365 to Honey Bear!

Happy Day 365 to Resiliensea!

Happy Day 365 to Stillbridge!

Happy Day 365 to Tru.d.true!

Happy Day 365 to Becca1978!

Happy Day 400 to Honoring Grae!

Happy Day 400 to Boozy Bett!

Happy Day 400 to A_Sober_Cannibal!

Happy Day 400 to Shannon A!

Happy Day 400 to Sisty!

Happy Day 400 to Sohocat!

Happy Day 400 to Ashley!

Happy Day 400 to Grace514!

Happy Day 400 to Indy!

Happy Day 400 to Pwhims!

Happy Day 400 to Rachel E!

Happy Day 400 to FlightPlan!

Happy Day 400 to Inspired!

Happy Day 500 to Rasberrikiss!

Happy Day 500 to Hollykate!

Happy Day 600 to KT Webb!

Happy Day 700 to ShellMN!

Happy Day 700 to SarahBee!

Happy Day 700 to NSRunner!

Happy Day 700 to Case Study Michelle!

Happy Day 800 to Sooz!

Happy Day 800 to EMJ001!

Happy Day 800 to Lavenderzone!

Happy Day 800 to TickleMeShelmo!

Happy Day 900 to ElizabethDC!

Happy Day 900 to Silver Birch!

Happy Day 900 to Mil!

Happy Day 900 to seekingpeace!

Happy Day 900 to Yoda!

Happy Day 900 to VTgirl!

Happy Day 900 to MJP!

Happy Day 900 to Inky!

Happy Day 900 to Graceful!

Happy Day 1000 to SophieSomething!

Happy Day 1000 to Yogayamagirl!

Happy Day 1000 to Jock!

Happy Day 1000 to Sea Turtle!

Happy Day 1000 to Miss M!

Happy Day 1100 to Junebug!

Happy Day 1100 to Frenchie!

Happy Day 1100 to Gabbygirl37!

Happy Day 1200 to Fleur!

Happy Day 1200 to Chatsworth!

Happy Day 1200 to Cricket!

Happy Day 1200 to Shar!

Happy Day 1200 to Kenney!

Happy Day 1300 to GW!

Happy Day 1300 to JustHadToHaveIt!

Happy Day 1300 to Apprentice Annie!

Happy Day 1300 to Parissienne Knitter!

Happy Day 1300 to Run Dontwine!

Happy Day 1300 to IrishGirl!

Happy Day 1400 to Jacques!

Happy Day 1400 to Rose!

Happy Day 1400 to Santa Cruz!

Happy Day 1400 to Phoebe!

Happy Day 1400 to Doll Face!

Happy Day 1400 to Telling The Words!

Happy Day 1400 to Sherri!

Happy Day 1400 to Lurking with Intent!

Happy Day 1400 to Libby!

Happy Day 1400 to Choutyfruity!

Happy Day 1400 to Winkle!

Happy Day 1400 to Challenges!

Happy Day 1500 to Jeroen!

Happy Day 1500 to Lucy!

Happy Day 1500 to TipTree!

Happy Day 1500 to Cat Girl!

Happy Day 1500 to Carolyne!

Happy Day 1600 to Kristi Coulter!

Happy Day 1600 to C How!

Happy Day 1600 to Sarita!

Happy Day 1600 to Ingrid!

Happy Day 1700 to Carrie!

Happy Day 1900 to Katherine!

 

Wednesday Celebration Roundup

Happy Day 50 to Stanley!

Happy Day 50 to Wafflehousemomma!

Happy Day 50 to Leener!

Happy Day 50 to Smokey!

Happy Day 50 to MelMel!

Happy Day 50 to Scrappy!

Happy Day 50 to Peppercorn!

Happy Day 50 to Springer

Happy Day 50 to Debbi Does Sober!

Happy Day 100 to LDM4ME!

Happy Day 100 to ree67!

Happy Day 100 to Mlodius!

Happy Day 100 to Frog!

Happy Day 100 to Bug June!

Happy Day 100 to MiMoMa!

Happy Day 100 to JenJen!

Happy Day 100 to CryBabyinCali!

Happy Day 100 to Lars!

Happy Day 100 to Flyaway!

Happy Day 100 to Sober Tea!

Happy Day 100 to Dry Ace!

Happy Day 180 to SDBKatz!

Happy Day 180 to AuntieMame!

Happy Day 180 to Arya!

Happy Day 200 to renne in rochester!

Happy Day 200 to LittleRed!

Happy Day 200 to Sandal!

Happy Day 200 to RedRidingHood!

Happy Day 300 to SoberinVa!

Happy Day 300 to Jaylee!

Happy Day 300 to MrsRoberts!

Happy Day 300 to Lizzytish!

Happy Day 300 to Peaceable J!

Happy Day 300 to Mindful Monica!

Happy Day 300 to SarahJune31!

Happy Day 365 to Blondie!

Happy Day 365 to Jamie-Tampa!

Happy Day 365 to Capt. Unwinded!

Happy Day 365 to Tiger2017!

Happy Day 365 to Honoring Grace!

Happy Day 365 to Boozy Betty!

Happy Day 365 to A_Sober_Cannibal!

Happy Day 365 to Shannon A!

Happy Day 365 to Sisty!

Happy Day 365 to SohoCat!

Happy Day 365 to Ashley!

Happy Day 400 to Calypso!

Happy Day 400 to Allie!

Happy Day 400 to Bunnie!

Happy Day 400 to Liz!

Happy Day 400 to A Girl Named Sam!

Happy Day 400 to Meadowmuffins!

Happy Day 400 to Jeans!

Happy Day 400 to AmandaJ!

Happy Day 400 to Jena14!

Happy Day 500 to JT Weir!

Happy Day 500 to Edi!

Happy Day 500 to Leftcoastgirl!

Happy Day 600 to CaseyM!

Happy Day 600 to Runnergirl!

Happy Day 700 to Trueleah!

Happy Day 700 to Phoenix!

Happy Day 700 to ChellyBelly!

Happy Day 800 to Linley!

Happy Day 900 to Grateful Girl!

Happy Day 900 to Jenuhful!

Happy Day 1000 to Coffeecuphead!

Happy Day 1000 to Kitkatpaddywack!

Happy Day 1000 to 1035!

Happy Day 1000 to Frankie!

Happy Day 1000 to LJ63!

Happy Day 1000 to Sean!

Happy Day 1100 to Elly!

Happy Day 1100 to 19Cathleen!

Happy Day 1100 to Rexytime!

Happy Day 1100 to Cocomack!

Happy Day 1100 to NewChris!

Happy Day 1100 to Jas!

Happy Day 1100 to Canadian Girl!

Happy Day 1200 to Paulita!

Happy Day 1200 to Artsmommy!

Happy Day 1200 to Ish!

Happy Day 1200 to Bekki!

Happy Day 1200 to Meagan!

Happy Day 1200 to Lara!

Happy Day 1300 to Janett!

Happy Day 1300 to tlecompte!

Happy Day 1300 to hcassstevens!

Happy Day 1300 to otherjosh!

Happy Day 1300 to runnermom!

Happy Day 1300 to jlynn!

Happy Day 1400 to KateF!

Happy Day 1400 to Margy!

Happy Day 1400 to Wanting to be a sober mom!

Happy Day 1400 to Tammi!

Happy Day 1400 to Shell Bell!

Happy Day 1400 to Tuomas!

Happy Day 1400 to Nuchter Maya!

Happy Day 1400 to Janet!

Happy Day 1400 to Beach_Gurl!

Happy Day 1500 to DianeLouise!

Happy Day 1600 to Original Betgh!

Happy Day 1600 to Leah!

Wednesday Celebration Roundup

Happy Day 50 to IC Momentum!

Happy Day 50 to Pahobe!

Happy Day 50 to Lordi!

Happy Day 50 to Ket!

Happy Day 50 to Garcia!

Happy Day 50 to Celine!

Happy Day 50 to LateTrier!

Happy Day 50 to RoseStar!

Happy Day 100 to ree67!

Happy Day 100 to Klowe!

Happy Day 100 to fifty & free!

Happy Day 100 to Sillymelove!

Happy Day 100 to mich2point0!

Happy Day 100 to Annikki!

Happy Day 100 to lmichel!

Happy Day 180 to renne in rochester!

Happy Day 180 to LittleRed!

Happy Day 180 to Sandal!

Happy Day 180 to RedRidingHood!

Happy Day 200 to Myriam!

Happy Day 200 to Goldie!

Happy Day 200 to Lex!

Happy Day 200 to Newg!

Happy Day 200 to Leigh Ann (penpal #3)!

Happy Day 200 to Alicat!

Happy Day 200 to Char S!

Happy Day 200 to RossFU!

Happy Day 200 to Superkitty!

Happy Day 200 to 35&changing!

Happy Day 300 to Lime Tree!

Happy Day 300 to Princess Buttercup!

Happy Day 300 to Wynn!

Happy Day 300 to Sophiestar!

Happy Day 300 to Jazzie!

Happy Day 300 to Gem64!

Happy Day 300 to Bruna!

Happy Day 300 to Nowinemom!

Happy Day 300 to SueW!

Happy Day 300 to Roadtosoberville!

Happy Day 300 to Kiki71!

Happy Day 300 to Honey Bear!

Happy Day 300 to Resiliensea!

Happy Day 365 to Grace514!

Happy Day 365 to Indy!

Happy Day 365 to Pwhims!

Happy Day 365 to Rachel E!

Happy Day 365 to FlightPlan!

Happy Day 365 to Inspired!

Happy Day 365 to Calypso!

Happy Day 365 to Allie!

Happy Day 365 to Bunnie!

Happy Day 365 to Liz!

Happy Day 365 to Girl Named Sam!

Happy Day 365 to Meadowmuffins!

Happy Day 365 to AmandaJ!

Happy Day 365 to Jena14!

Happy Day 400 to Gene!

Happy Day 400 to Lola4126!

Happy Day 400 to TJS!

Happy Day 400 to Ruby Harper!

Happy Day 400 to Poppy!

Happy Day 400 to Topo Chico!

Happy Day 400 to Ruby!

Happy Day 400 to Hollm!

Happy Day 400 to Reg!

Happy Day 400 to bemmy girl!

Happy Day 400 to BattleMatt!

Happy Day 400 to Maverick!

Happy Day 400 to Aprile!

Happy Day 400 to Froggy Google!

Happy Day 400 to Unduped!

Happy Day 500 to Rogueyogi!

Happy Day 500 to Miss Kell!

Happy Day 500 to Dry Ginger!

Happy Day 500 to Reenie!

Happy Day 500 to Imara!

Happy Day 600 to Auds!

Happy Day 600 to KaffyB!

Happy Day 600 to Debbie!

Happy Day 600 to KLC!

Happy Day 600 to Country Pat!

Happy Day 600 to Lanza!

Happy Day 600 to Chell!

Happy Day 600 to Franny!

Happy Day 600 to Husband #1!

Happy Day 700 to Hughie!

Happy Day 700 to JP!

Happy Day 700 to Gypsy Girl!

Happy Day 800 to Cal!

Happy Day 800 to Gordon!

Happy Day 800 to Unwinedgal!

Happy Day 900 to tk!

Happy Day 1000 to Indian Lake!

Happy Day 1000 to MelP!

Happy Day 1000 to Solstice Guy!

Happy Day 1000 to Summer Walking!

Happy Day 1000 to Turcotte!

Happy Day 1000 to Southern Magnolia1013!

Happy Day 1000 to Maureen!

Happy Day 1100 to GG!

Happy Day 1100 to Festie!

Happy Day 1100 to Graceb!

Happy Day 1100 to Paris!

Happy Day 1100 to Shout444!

Happy Day 1100 to Midwestveggie!

Happy Day 1100 to Rah!

Happy Day 1100 to RoseMarie!

Happy Day 1100 to Janna!

Happy Day 1100 to Jacqui!

Happy Day 1100 to Kelz!

Happy Day 1100 to Petunia!

Happy Day 1200 to Sharlotte!

Happy Day 1200 to Mizgabz!

Happy Day 1200 to Sanfransober!

Happy Day 1200 to Sarah72!

Happy Day 1200 to CassieB!

Happy Day 1200 to Shelby!

Happy Day 1200 to Weenie!

Happy Day 1200 to 1111!

Happy Day 1200 to Manda!

Happy Day 1300 to Julie-Joy’s Dad!

Happy Day 1300 to Jessie!

Happy Day 1300 to Heike!

Happy Day 1300 to Isabel!

Happy Day 1300 to Daybird!

Happy Day 1300 to LolaB!

Happy Day 1300 to Connie!

Happy Day 1300 to Fich!

Happy Day 1300 to Hank!

Happy Day 1300 to Aschae!

Happy Day 1300 to Emery!

Happy Day 1400 to Denise!

Happy Day 1400 to TheFun4!

Happy Day 1400 to terence!

Happy Day 1400 to Clear Eyed Girl!

Happy Day 1400 to Hazeleyes!

Happy Day 1400 to Case Study Tim!

Happy Day 1400 to Baby girl butterfly!

Happy Day 1400 to Primrose!

Happy Day 1400 to Sadie!

Happy Day 1400 to SignGurl!

Happy Day 1400 to Jeannie Yogini!

Happy Day 1400 to Jilly Bean!

Happy Day 1500 to Jenisthesoberist!

Happy Day 1500 to Sharon!

Happy Day 1500 to LD!

Happy Day 1500 to Laurie!

Happy Day 1600 to Kate Sober Journalist!

Happy Day 1700 to Amy!

Happy Day 1915 to me!

aim for a high, firm bottom

from my inbox:

From E (day 128): “I follow a sober girl and when she was starting off, I followed her, left encouraging comments on the blog. She relapses frequently … and i got frustrated; my reaction is initially to try to fix her. or to say bracing things to her. none of which will help her, I’m sure.  but I do check the blog occasionally, like picking a scab that is irritating me 🙁 so my considered response is probably to back away, strengthen the boundaries between her and me. because her actions are her own responsibility and not mine … and I need to find a way of dealing with that.  but when she leaves sad comments I am at a loss as to how to respond. I generally go for something non-committal, or don’t reply. any thoughts on how I can let this person take up less space in my head?! you must get this all the time in your position!”

me:  I know this feeling, I think that reading blogs of repeated relapsers isn’t terribly helpful. except to remind us that we never want another day 1 again. there are some people’s blogs that i read when i first was getting sober, that started to blog about ‘moderation’ or about how being sober wasn’t for them, I unfollowed them. When i was starting, I want to surround myself with stories of how to be successfully sober … Do I now work with people who AREN’T successfully sober, yes. do I have a lot of patience? yes. do I overinvest in them more than they are invested in themselves? no. it’s about boundaries, I think … wolfie gets into some people’s heads. it’s terrifying to watch. they know that they’re being possessed. they know that the train is coming and they’re standing on the tracks. and they can’t get off the tracks.  it’s not logical. addiction isn’t logical. that’s the horror of it. people die. they can’t figure out how to get off the tracks and then get squished by the train, by wolfie, by booze. it happens all the fucking time.  all we can do is wave from safe land and say “come here” because while giving ideas is helpful, tough love doesn’t seem to work …  huglets

E: “Tx for this. V helpful. Agree totally re harshness not working. I think for me, snippets of things other people have said have unexpectedly made a massive difference. But I can’t guess what those things will be for someone else 🙁 it makes me so sad for that person. Such a waste. Thank you for all you do to be a lighthouse!”

me:  she will find her way. or she will get squished by the train. wolfie sometimes does suck the life out of perfectly nice people. what’s better? quit early. a high firm bottom. better.

E: “Absolutely. One of best things I recall from your podcast was you saying that we think we will quit later, when we HAVE to – as if it will be easier then. When of course the later we leave it, the more difficult it gets 🙁 earlier and firmer indeed!”

Monday Celebration Roundup

Happy Day 50 to MiMoMa!

Happy Day 50 to Grace (penpal #26)!

Happy Day 50 to Katrinka!

Happy Day 50 to Glitter!

Happy Day 50 to JenJen!

Happy Day 50 to CryBabyinCali!

Happy Day 50 to i.t.!

Happy Day 50 to Lars!

Happy Day 50 to Flyaway!

Happy Day 50 to Lotus Lady!

Happy Day 50 to Sober Tea!

Happy Day 50 to Klowe!

Happy Day 100 to LiquidTracy!

Happy Day 100 to LinZeeLou!

Happy Day 100 to Rambling Rose!

Happy Day 100 to MsM!

Happy Day 100 to Kimpossible!

Happy Day 100 to Doriomom!

Happy Day 100 to BalanceBeam!

Happy Day 100 to Nixie!

Happy Day 100 to BirdSetFree!

Happy Day 100 to Mia!

Happy Day 100 to Hellacious!

Happy Day 100 to Oriole!

Happy Day 100 to Sobriety Unlocked!

Happy Day 180 to Newg!

Happy Day 180 to Leigh Ann (penpal #3)!

Happy Day 180 to Winefreeme!

Happy Day 180 to Alicat!

Happy Day 180 to Superkitty!

Happy Day 180 to 35&changing!

 

Happy Day 200 to Jacci2!

Happy Day 200 to Sobersparkles!

Happy Day 200 to Mrs.Wooly!

Happy Day 200 to NatureNancy!

Happy Day 200 to redredwine!

Happy Day 200 to Ninabear!

Happy Day 200 to Aimee!

Happy Day 200 to Kaycee!

Happy Day 300 to Stillbridge!

Happy Day 300 to true.d.true!

Happy Day 300 to Elyn Jones!

Happy Day 300 to Becca1978!

Happy Day 300 to Jamie-Tampa!

Happy Day 300 to Capt. Unwined!

Happy Day 300 to Lerawk!

Happy Day 300 to Tiger2017!

Happy Day 365 to Gene!

Happy Day 365 to Lola4126!

Happy Day 365 to TJS!

Happy Day 365 to RubyHarper!

Happy Day 365 to Poppy!

Happy Day 365 to Topo Chico!

Happy Day 365 to Ruby!

Happy Day 365 to Hollm!

Happy Day 365 to Reg!

Happy Day 400 to frupa63!

Happy Day 400 to Tsilver!

Happy Day 400 to VMD free!

Happy Day 400 to Lippy!

Happy Day 400 to TT!

Happy Day 400 to Tierrazul!

Happy Day 500 to KatieMay!

Happy Day 500 to Clearlee!

Happy Day 600 to TJ!

Happy Day 600 to SoberInMtl!

Happy Day 600 to ScrubJay!

Happy Day 600 to Binkles!

Happy Day 600 to Elis!

Happy Day 600 to Lydster!

Happy Day 600 to TrixeeK!

Happy Day 600 to Fern!

Happy Day 600 to Coco!

Happy Day 700 to Tree!

Happy Day 700 to Lucia!

Happy Day 700 to Juliejean123!

Happy Day 700 to RossFSU!

Happy Day 700 to Ami!

Happy Day 800 to Meraki!

Happy Day 800 to Heya Monster!

Happy Day 800 to Shortternnoterm!

Happy Day 800 to Liberte!

Happy Day 800 to AnnieB!

Happy Day 800 to Youngernow!

Happy Day 800 to AnnaD!

Happy Day 800 to Whitbell25!

Happy Day 800 to Beck!

Happy Day 800 to Ginette!

Happy Day 900 to Oz!

Happy Day 900 to Julie-Joy’s Sister!

Happy Day 900 to Faye858!

Happy Day 900 to me-fixing-me!

Happy Day 900 to mythreesons!

Happy Day 900 to Honner!

Happy Day 900 to gingerade!

Happy Day 1000 to Library Girl!

Happy Day 1000 to Joannie!

Happy Day 1000 to Chace!

Happy Day 1100 to Dancing Rabbit!

Happy Day 1100 to Microlady!

Happy Day 1100 to AlexP!

Happy Day 1100 to Chefstarr!

Happy Day 1100 to Monique!

Happy Day 1100 to iphonebonnie!

Happy Day 1100 to chachi!

Happy Day 1100 to nomorepinot!

Happy Day 1200 to Sober Lemon!

Happy Day 1200 to PP!

Happy Day 1200 to Foxie!

Happy Day 1200 to Renee!

Happy Day 1200 to Battersea Park!

Happy Day 1200 to Welles!

Happy Day 1200 to Gra!

Happy Day 1200 to SusieQ!

Happy Day 1200 to IrishDee!

Happy Day 1300 to Going2pieces!

Happy Day 1300 to Apprentice SoberP!

Happy Day 1300 to Blake!

Happy Day 1300 to DeeN!

Happy Day 1300 to FitFatFood!

Happy Day 1300 to Moore!

Happy Day 1300 to Crispy!

Happy Day 1400 to Kirst!

Happy Day 1400 to Mylene!

Happy Day 1400 to InNeedOfGrace!

Happy Day 1500 to Durf11!

Happy Day 1600 to JM!

Happy Day 1600 to Rebecca!

Happy Day 1600 to Digs!

Happy Day 1700 to Amy!

Happy Day 1900 to Thirteenpointone!

 

loneliness, depression, or boredom

from my inbox:

L: “I’m not doing well. I keep starting and failing. I keep starting out in the morning with plans for a new day 1, even get one occasionally, then feel so good, I decide to get some wine. So stupid, I know. I even thought the Solstice to Solstice would be a good marker for me, but nope. I subscribed to more audios from you, have increased treats … but still fall short in the evening with loneliness, depression, or boredom. I was even half hoping I would get my daughter’s cold, so I would quit again, got two weeks in last time, but went backwards again. My doctor prescribed meds to use to get past the cravings, but I’m always afraid to take stuff, so I haven’t tried them. That seems ridiculous too, since I have no problem poisoning myself with wine.. I don’t want to get caught in the thought of, Oh I’ll just wait until the first of the month. I want this to be my day 1 that sticks.. It will be when I get home from work today, and my brain will say, Oh it vacation time, you have a week off, or one more night, which of course there is no such thing! Heavy sigh.”

me: I know that feeling. I’d quit in the morning and then drink at 6 pm. and then repeat. someone told me they had 1000 day 1s (like 3 years worth) and I believed them. and you know what, it’s normal and totally predictable that someone with an anxiety issue would have anxiety about taking the medication 🙂 you can take it anyway, as a trial. you’ve tried other stuff, you haven’t tried this, and it might help. you don’t wait for special days. you want to feel better today so you start now. date of last drink can be today. really. and reach out for more support. if we are booked to talk once a week, you may find it easier to be more accountable and to get the courage to try the other things that will help. ~ hugs from me

 

 

shameless commercial link: book available in paperback, kindle & audio MP3 versions. www.100daysoberchallenge.com  Available through Gumroad, which means you can pay with a credit card, including AMEX, no paypal required. Electronic files delivered instantly. Get the bundle.

Tuesday Celebration Roundup

Happy Day 50 to ree67!

Happy Day 50 to Fifty & Free!

Happy Day 50 to Sillymelove!

Happy Day 50 to Gracesea!

Happy Day 50 to mich2point0!

Happy Day 100 to Arya!

Happy Day 180 to Hernoodlyness!

Happy Day 180 to Jacci2!

Happy Day 180 to Honeybadger!

Happy Day 180 to Sobersparkles!

Happy Day 180 to Mrs.Wooly!

Happy Day 180 to NatureNancy!

Happy Day 180 to redredwine!

Happy Day 200 to La Sobria!

Happy Day 200 to Bridget!

Happy Day 200 to Blou!

Happy Day 200 to Jazzhands70!

Happy Day 200 to RetiringPartyGirl!

Happy Day 200 to Stefanie!

Happy Day 200 to IngridandMac!

Happy Day 200 to Peewit!

Happy Day 200 to Lavender!

Happy Day 200 to Sheree!

Happy Day 200 to Gina!

Happy Day 200 to Helen!

Happy Day 200 to LunaBlu!

Happy Day 200 to Gomez!

Happy Day 200 to Sings!

Happy Day 200 to ararebird!

Happy Day 200 to mummabear!

Happy Day 300 to Honoring Grace!

Happy Day 300 to Boozy Betty!

Happy Day 300 to A_Sober_Cannibal!

Happy Day 300 to Shannon!

Happy Day 300 to Sisty!

Happy Day 300 to Sohocat!

Happy Day 300 to Ashley!

Happy Day 300 to Grace514!

Happy Day 300 to Indy!

Happy Day 300 to Pwhims!

Happy Day 365 to Bemmy Girl!

Happy Day 365 to BattleMatt!

Happy Day 365 to Maverick!

Happy Day 365 to Molly Jones!

Happy Day 365 to April!

Happy Day 365 to Jaded!

Happy Day 365 to RachelB!

Happy Day 400 to Nomobsing!

Happy Day 400 to Sabrina!

Happy Day 500 to Patten!

Happy Day 500 to KT Web!

Happy Day 600 to ShellMN!

Happy Day 600 to SarahBee!

Happy Day 600 to NSRunner!

Happy Day 600 to mamafergs!

Happy Day 700 to Sooz!

Happy Day 700 to EMJ001!

Happy Day 700 to Lavenderzone!

Happy Day 700 to TickleMeShelmo!

Happy Day 800 to Lilac!

Happy Day 800 to ElizabethDC!

Happy Day 800 to Silver Birch!

Happy Day 800 to Mil!

Happy Day 800 to Seekingpeace!

Happy Day 800 to Yoda!

Happy Day 800 to VTgirl!

Happy Day 800 to MJP!

Happy Day 900 to Sophiesomething!

Happy Day 900 to Rache B!

Happy Day 900 to YogayamagirlJock!

Happy Day 900 to Sea Turtle!

Happy Day 1000 to Junebug!

Happy Day 1000 to Frenchie!

Happy Day 1100 to Fleur!

Happy Day 1100 to Chatsworth!

Happy Day 1100 to Cricket!

Happy Day 1100 to Shar!

Happy Day 1200 to GW!

Happy Day 1200 to JustHadToHaveIt!

Happy Day 1200 to Apprentice Annie!

Happy Day 1200 to ParisienneKnitter!

Happy Day 1200 to Run Dontwine!

Happy Day 1300 to Jacques!

Happy Day 1300 to Rose!

Happy Day 1300 to Santa Cruz!

Happy Day 1300 to Phoebe!

Happy Day 1300 to Doll Face!

Happy Day 1300 to Telling The Words!

Happy Day 1300 to Sherri!

Happy Day 1300 to Lurking with Intent!

Happy Day 1300 to Libby!

Happy Day 1300 to Traci!

Happy Day 1300 to Winkle!

Happy Day 1400 to Jeroen!

Happy Day 1400 to Lucy!

Happy Day 1400 to TipTree!

Happy Day 1400 to Cat Girl!

Happy Day 1500 to Kristi Coulter!

Happy Day 1500 to C How!

Happy Day 1500 to Sarita!

Happy Day 1500 to Ingrid!

Happy Day 1600 to Carrie!