kindness

from my inbox:

bits about the blog compilation:

Big Jane: “Well done. I printed the whole thing out in work – crashed the printer and made myself super unpopular. Stayed up half the night with pages and pages all over the bed. It’s brilliant. Who is going to play you when the screenplay is bought by the Cohen Brothers?!” (me: well, i do look quite a bit like Ally Sheedy)

Jock: “Sober. Have been enjoying Ktwftd. Having the blog in one document is very helpful – good call. Seeing there the arc of your journey from a dark and unpleasant place to confident wellness is inspiring. Seeing a similar pattern emerge in one’s own life is just great and reinforces the sanity of choosing sobriety! Thank you Belle.”

JenniferKay: “Good Morning. I got your book. I love the cover. I love having a sober secret, but I want to tell everyone that there is an easier way! Here are the two things that make me NEVER want to go back: 1. It’s so hard at the beginning, and it consumes too much of your life. 2. Sleep. Why is there so much fear about letting alcohol go??? I want a definitive answer 🙂 Happy Day Belle (the published author). You are so deserving of the honor. PS: I’ve been juicing more, and all the green juices taste the same no matter what I put in them, and beets taste like dirt.” (me: beet tastes like dirt but I like it. the only way to make the juice taste like something is to add a big hunk of ginger, or fresh basil, or ground chili pepper, or put some salsa through the juicer too … you need to add ‘stuff’. I love having a sober secret too. I think that fear is huge. people think they can’t quit. but of course they can. they think their friends will care – and only boozers care. they think they’re too shy/broken/insecure. and that’s really what it’s about. and that fear is made WORSE by drinking …)

Belle

I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I’m tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

3 thoughts to “kindness”

  1. I can totally relate to what Jennifer posted about it being so hard in the beginning and the fear of letting alcohol go – which makes absolutely no sense to a rational non-alkie. But that’s how I felt. As much as I wanted to quit (and maybe I really didn’t for a long time) I was afraid to actually throw out that stash I had hidden in the house. I just felt like I NEEDED to have it there. I finally have achieved 6-1/2 months and on this last go around I did throw it ALL out, and I’m glad I did. To have it sitting there would just be way too tempting. It’s sitting there…can’t let it go to waste, or something along those lines. Then I would need to replenish it. That never ending cycle. And I was afraid for the longest time that I wouldn’t be able to sleep without it since I was so accustomed to passing out as soon as my head hit the pillow – not falling asleep without it like a normal person. I’m happy to say that even though that was hard in the beginning, I did learn to sleep without it, and I’m sure I’m sleeping much better (except for my big dog who thinks she owns the bed LOL). But I for sure feel better in the morning not being hungover, or worse, hitting it in the AM to feel “normal”. Ugh.

  2. I love my sleep! I never want to go back because I would be all yucky at night again!
    Happy I stopped 7.5 months ago.
    Thank you so much, Belle!

  3. I had a huge crisis this weekend at more than 300 days sober. I REALLY wanted a drink or 10. I bought your book instead. I LOVE it, just love it. I want more now (now what does that remind me of?). When is the next book? When? When? 🙂

    Thanks so much Belle for saving my ass yet again. xx

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