“I never thought I could do this”
From my inbox:
Ldederer (day 95):
When I first emailed you – I never thought I could do this. I had looked at your blog so many times. I had seen those names in big red letters, and thought to myself, I will never be listed there. 100 Days, 50 days, no freaking way.
Well, here I am, 5 days away from the end of the challenge.
I haven’t had a drink, I go to AA, I am feeling my feelings, no matter how good or bad they are. I am no longer numbing them with alcohol.
I have had good days, and a whole bunch of bad ones.
I have cried, a lot.
I have felt raw, lost, sad, confused, and happy.
I have regrets, a lot of them, but I don’t regret not drinking, not for one minute.
In the beginning I thought I would drink again after the 100 days, but I can’t be a quitter. I can’t change what I have felt over the last 95 days, the changes I have made, I want more.
So, even after the challenge is over, I am going to keep on keeping on, One Day at a Time.
Thank you for opening the door to the sober car and suggesting I take a test drive.”
[and now she’s on day 131]