the cult of belle

everything is like everything. sobriety is like running. at first you think you’re going to fall over, out of breath, and then as you build up some muscles and some wind power you realize that you’re going to be OK with occasionally shitty bits.

everything is like everything. sobriety is like doing the dishes. if you wait until you have all of dirty dishes collected in one place, plates scraped, silverware soaking — before you can begin, then you’ll want to wait until your perfect life is perfect until you attempt sobriety (doesn’t happen).

sobriety is like the weather. don’t like the grey? wait a few days. it’ll change.

sobriety with SUPPORT is like a big hug. all those ideas you have in your head, those yearnings, those tricky wolfie bits — they all make sense when you begin to share them with someone else.

support might be an email from a strange-stranger-in-a-strange-land (me). someone’s husband felt that if she emailed me about sobriety then it was a like a cult and she was at risk of being sucked into some kind of internet scam. Yeah, that’s right. a sobriety scam. The cult of belle.  As i emailed to Kelly and ST yesterday (yes, you, the two of you who i’m going to introduce to each other once you both have 30+ days), i said: “if you go missing, i’ll come and try to rustle you up. Hi there, i’ll say. Here I am. It’s the cult of Belle. Get sober, or I’m coming the fuck after you and dragging you into a happy life whether you like it or not.”

ok. not really. but you know what i mean.

truth is, we’re just BETTER as sober humans. We’re better people. We’re happier. And as i also wrote yesterday by email … sobriety suits you. Relapse? not interested. it’s just a gigantic waste of time and a depressing sewer. Don’t wanna hang around the sewer. Me neither. Time to step firmly in to the sunshine. even if you hate it. even if you hate sunshine and ease and flow and you hate reduced anxiety and you hate better sleep and you hate feeling better. Yup. Even if you hate it. Time to go.

 

Belle

I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

44 thoughts on “the cult of belle

  1. Um, I drank the coolaid from the cult of Belle.. Are you speaking of my Mr. Who believes it’s culty and scammy to get sober any way possible? I am not sure if I am a brainwashed child, but dammit sober makes it all better and worth any scam I can be involved in 😉

  2. I’ve joined worse cults. I believe the last one was the cult of Oh-sure-you-can-drink-one-or-two-on-vacation-and-other-special-occasions-and-it-won’t-make-you-want-to-drink-five-or-six-every-day-thereafter. This big, ugly guy named Wolfie was the leader. Really scary. Turns out, however, that he was just an insecure, self-hating bully, and when I stood up to him (with the help of my new cult), he became a scrawny, shaky weasel. As you said, Belle, relapse is a “gigantic waste of time and a depressing sewer.” When I took that route, all I wanted was to be sober and free again. Thank you, Cult of Belle!

    1. “I’ve joined worse cults. I believe the last one was the cult of Oh-sure-you-can-drink-one-or-two-on-vacation-and-other-special-occasions-and-it-won’t-make-you-want-to-drink-five-or-six-every-day-thereafter” Oh yeah–I was def. a card carrying member of that cult. The Cult of Belle is much better 🙂

  3. I have to admit I was leery when I first came upon the website. I didn’t lurk I just plunged right in with the pledge and thought about it later. Then came the audios and phone call. Belle made me feel very comfortable and I am still here and proud to be on day 48. This cult works if you work it! (and you are worth it!)

  4. Belle has told me that I can never again drink LOL…but she is so right on so many levels. Maybe we need some type of Belle t-shirt 😉 (ST – we WILL do this! Looking forward to meeting you soon.)

  5. Love the Belle cult, too!! What a wunderful ‘Geuzennaam’!
    In Dutch, this is a name originally meant to be not nice at all – and then proudly adopted by the person/people called the name. Here another happy & proud member 😉

  6. Count me in! You hear the word “cult” and immediately you want to run far way from that, but not the Cult of Belle. It’s helping me immensely.

  7. I find it hilarious that sobriety would be considered a cult. Kinda like thinking that someone might over-do soberness. That is impossible for sure.

  8. I want to be in your cult ! I have up drinking on the 6 th Jan and made it to 55 days. I was so proud of myself and so happy. Then I slowly started drinking again and it sucks ! I stared just on the weekends and of course it progressed to every night, having blackouts etc … Starting to feel anxious again and regretting ever starting back with the stuff 🙁
    By the way your blog helped me to get that far in the first place. This time I am going to do 100 days and am going to feel good about myself again. I know its possible. I really don’t know why I started on the booze again 🙁

      1. Thank you ! I have signed up to go on the waiting list. My last drink was Sunday 27th. So am now on day three.
        I read through your entire first months blogs last night and it has really helped inspire me. Thank you 🙂

  9. Hi Belle, Just wondering about starting the challenge. You said I could start but am I supposed to be emailing you each day ? Or am I still on the waiting list ?
    I am now on day eight without any booze !

  10. help……………; need this cult….; past 10 mons…; did 28 days alchold free; in between have drank 4 days out of 30; but damnit always have one or two slips…; last month – 21 days; then given in to the alleged happiness of wine…; is this a cult?????????????????????…; well it hasnt cultize me yet..and i want it too…; on yet another day 3 story of my life

  11. 28 days today. I have not gone 28 days without for years. Thank you for the support and putting words to my feelings. I am SHOCKED at how much better I feel and how much easier this is than I expected. Years of wasting my nights with wine are over. There have been a few tricky bits surely, but your blog has made them navigable. Thank you!

  12. Absolutely loving being part of this cult! It has dragged me far away from the sewer (love that image). Thank you so so so much for being a great cult leader

  13. I felt crappy today (Sunday) but not the hung over, tired, anxious, frantic crappy I used to when I drank. If it was a cult it would promise to fix every crappy day. It doesn’t but like Belle says, the crappiest sober day is better than any day one. DR

  14. Today I am 15 mins into day 100…. My initial goal was 100 days, deep down someone ( and belle), are managing yo kr Wolfe at bay…. I am so them opted, I am on holiday, it was my husband, daughter and my birthday this week… How hard is it, fuck me it’s a battle… My husband is being amazing, and I am just about handing in, then I read a belle, and boy does it help.
    Thank you, now fuck of wolf as day 100 to 6 months next steps… Good night

  15. My cult leader rocks! Go belle! Go me!!
    I’d love a t-shirt with the cult of belle on it.
    My first cult. Loving it. I rock also when I’m part of this cult. It makes me stronger, happier, more fun and loving life. I can take a fork to wolfie. He hides behind my washing machine but I’m big and powerful in this cult. Run Wolfe run!

  16. Just read this at 6:14 am in TX . A blessing and spot on as always. I am on day 22 today and would not be winning the ridiculous arguments with that crazy voice in my head without your words of wisdom…thanks Belle

  17. Love it – Belle’s cult! I’m on Day 15 and embracing the more productive more energetic me 😉 All in, drinking the koolaid (non-alcoholic, that is)…

  18. I am 3 weeks away from my 3 year soberversary thanks to the cult of Belle. I know I’ve read this post before and went searching for my comment to see how I was feeling at that point in my sobriety. Now I see I never posted a comment. I remember feeling too shy and scared to comment on blogs or even take my free Sober Jumpstart call. Looking back, I think that was Wolfie telling me that no one wanted to hear what I had to say. But Wolfie doesn’t control me anymore, and now when he occasionally whispers in my ear, I tell him to fuck off and go back to sleep. To everyone just starting on this journey, it does get easier, your thoughts and feelings do matter, and you deserve a peaceful life. And you’re not bothering Belle! I finally set up a call with her somewhere between years 1 & 2 when I needed some advice and she was lovely & supportive. Keep moving forward, sober rock stars! Sobriety hasn’t solved all my problems, but it’s given me the strength and confidence to start clearing out the stuff that created the bad feelings I tried to numb by pouring booze on my head. Thank you, dear Belle!

  19. Thank you Belle. I have never felt better in my entire life as I do now. My life has been a rollercoaster for the last 3 years. The death of my mother in law to dementia and the years of living with it through her. To last year losing my Father in February then just 4 weeks later losing my Mom also. Drinking took me away from all of the loss and pain. I/m now in the sunshine and can.t understand why I ever wanted to feel the way I did with alcohol. Thank you so much for helping me to get my life back. I will be in that cult the rest of my life.

  20. I’m here. It is day 2 for me. Not long, I know. But it sure puts just a little smile on my face that I’m past day 1. Wolfie spoke as I sat down to homework with my daughter, but I smiled and thought ” day 2,and I sure don’t want to ever do day 1 again”.

  21. Could you wash my brain a little more please, Cult of Belle? There’s still a whole lot of grit in the grey matter lurking from 33 years of listening to that wolfie anus stink and letting him wash it the wrong way it for way too long. 😀

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