“It’s like you are me”

from me:

return to real life after vacation is … lovey. i like coming home again. turns out any town at christmastime is gonna be mostly closed. even the capital of christmas! saw lots, walked lots, got rained on, watched bad tv, had 2 naps a day. all is well. it’ll take me a couple of days to catch up on emails 🙂

from my inbox:

J: “Random question, Belle- why don’t you run/allow more ads on the site? I would think that would be an easy way to generate revenue in a non-confrontational way. It’s really none of my business, but with debate about the “tiny gift button” I was curious. (As for me, I think there is nothing wrong with the TGB — we all look for ways to express out gratitude).

me: “re ads. i don’t sell more advertising space mostly because I don’t like ads when i see them on other sites. I guess I’d rather earn money some other way. and to be really honest, I have a regular job and so this isn’t really supposed to be money earning … yes, I’ve earned some money on this sober website, but if i’m honest i’ll have to admit that I haven’t spent any of the money yet (it’s all sitting in paypal still). I haven’t yet figured out what I’m doing with the money. Maybe I’m funding my future bakery 🙂 I guess I like the way that I’m doing this now, without any anticipation of payment. I have to watch dollars and cents very closely with Job #1, maximizing sales and advertising and copy and shit, and so I’m glad to be free of it here.  And thanks for asking :)”

~

Annie2: “Thinking about the day I started this journey.  I felt so awful, physically and emotionally, just trying to figure out how to get off the nut train of alcohol addiction (‘course I knew I wasn’t addicted!).  Just aimlessly googling and you popped up.  Time was getting short and I had to leave for work, but I remember the feelings of relief I had when I spontaneously reached out to you, I knew that I had something to hang onto and I felt like maybe this is what I had been looking for.  I was looking forward to coming home and checking my email, hoping that there was something positive waiting for me.  There was!  I was on my way!!! Thank you, thank you for being here for us…” {she’s now on day 59}

~

LE: “HI Belle, I am reading Month 2 of your Blog Posts. It’s like you are me. The bottle of wine calls to me from the room.   Better take a sip of hubby’s drink while he is in the washroom. Gotta get my fill!  I have thought about quitting for so long now but I can’t even get through one day. How do you get through day 1? On Monday I came down with a cold so I thought hey do what Belle does, go to bed, avoid the drink. Well I had a NeoCitron in bed with a shot of gin. I haven’t been able to go one day and I am under the weather. I just need to get through day 1.  Any advice? Thanks for posting, you make me feel sane.”

me: “I think the way to have a day one is just to accept that it will be a crappy day, and then just get it done. Because the pride you’ll feel in the morning will make up for the shitty evening before.  Also if you sign up for the challenge you’ll have more momentum 🙂 whenever you’re ready to feel better, I’ll be here, hugs from me”

 

Belle

I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I'm tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

10 thoughts to ““It’s like you are me””

  1. Day one is the hardest day of all, except for days two thru eleven !~! Once I got past that first week I felt as tho I had accomplished a huge deal and it got easier. Day one is hard, take a shower, drink a big glass of cold water and take a nap. Then do it all again until the day is thru. I promise, It Gets Easier…

  2. I love vacations and I really love coming home from them to my own bed, my three kitties, my gardens and my workshop. Vacations are for recharging and generating new ideas for the next big project. Glad you had a great time.

  3. Day one is hard and frightening (at least it was for me) I’ve had quite a few ‘day one’s’ and Belle is right…You just have to accept that it’s going to be hard and you’re probably going to feel lousy…But one full day without drinking can kick start you into day two. And something that helps me is warm lemon water! It helps with dehydration and it helps detox the liver.

  4. I think Day 1, and many other days, come down to, “What do you want MORE?” You know what your life is like with alcohol. When you want the positives of sobriety MORE than a drink, you’ll get through day 1. Open your mind to the possibilities and re-open your mind all day, every time you want a drink.

  5. Hi Belle! Glad you had a great holiday. As for day 1, it was easy for me because I was disgusted with myself (sorry so negative, but truthful). I was LITERALLY TIRED OF THINKING ABOUT DRINKING. Sneaking the sips, topping off, getting more than half the bottle (and why only one?), thinking it was 5:00 somewhere, right? (all wolfie). I then read Good Housekeeping, saw Belle’s blog, “TiredOfThinkingAboutDrinking” and almost fell off my chair. Here I am today, 41 days sober. I do not think about drinking as much because there is so much more to do, feel, experience, but I still have my moments and I come here, to visit with Belle and everyone else. It really does get better with the right supports and I found eating a healthy dinner and going to be early (and at least for now NO PARTIES) really works for me. Thanks again Belle! And LE, just try day one. TF4

  6. great posts. welcome back belle. i think in response to person about money for this, i think u do this for the help it gives u and all of us. i thank u so much for that. also,for the other person i say stay focused on a saying “fuck u wolfie” or a pretty picture (i have a violet picture) it really does helps

  7. I agree ‘Fuck you wolfie’ was the single most powerful weapon I used to get me through day one. It was bellowed at full blast in a crowded supermarket, shrieked out from within my car ( windows up) and animated on a napkin with speech bubbles and a dagger thru his bollocks in a pretty little cafe….. Try it. It really works! It’s a scientific breakthrough I reckon….

    All the very best. You really can do this 🙂

    X

  8. Day 1 just completely, absolutely fucking sucks. Just put on your big girl panties and get it over with , you will be so glad you did. Stay out of the kitchen or the bar or wherever it is you drink. Then, day 2 is just that tiny little bit easier, and day 3 again a fraction easier, until you’re at 100 and the world is a better place. A much better place.

  9. so how does everyone handle a bad day of work or bad days which is usually the case. I was sober for 5 years and then had that first sip and now 5 years later so wanting that sobriety again, but after a day at work it’s just like how can I forget about this day :(. I joined Women for Sobriety to get those 5 years and they follow 13 statements and one of them is “problems bother me only to the point I let them” or something like that, but even repeating that statement isn’t helping. They also mention on the message board “Do not pick up that drink…NO MATTER WHAT”…any advice will be helpful, as I am so sick and tired of being this sick and tired. I am so thankful that I picked up that Good Housekeeping article and found this blog along with Amy’s that I feel like I am on the right track and realize that I really deep down want to stop this nonsense.

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