channelling steve jobs

My ability to meditate is poor. I can sit on the tile floor of the bathroom, post run, pre shower. I can set my watch timer for 5 or 6 minutes. I can repeat “ease and flow” or “joy-joy-joy” and within seconds i’m off on my to-do list, thinking about which leftovers need to be eaten first (the pork tenderloin), wondering if it’s too early to start the catering prep (think i’ll freeze some lemon squares).

I try to focus on what i can hear outside of myself (or inside myself), and I can’t hear anything.

I wonder what it would be like to be able to channel Steve Jobs or Napoleon Hill while meditating. Could i have a conversation with them? What would I ask. I think i’d ask “What kind of person do I have to become?”

And yet, i think i already know the answer. I realized this very early in my sobriety (end of month 3):

Who do I have to *become* in order to achieve my life goals?

I need to be someone who gets enough sleep 6 out of 7 nights, who is ‘in-advance’, who is patient, who does today what needs to be done and doesn’t wait for tomorrow. I need to be someone who rewards myself small and big, someone who pats myself on the back for a job well done. And someone who takes enough time off and has enough mid-week mini vacations to make it all worthwhile.

Ladies and gentlemen, I have shit I want to DO with this very cool life of mine, and so i need to become the right kind of person. i need to evolve. and for me, the first step in evolution is enough sleep.

Right. Treats and rewards.  funny thing this, cuz I recorded audio #4 today about treats and rewards.

Click here to listen to a small audio extract about rewards (1:42 min)

So in order to become the person who can achieve the life goals I want, I need to take some of my own advice! (and remember what I’ve already learned back in September). I’m writing this down now, this is how i write to myself apparently. I am going to take some of my tiny gift money and i’m going buy myself some treats tomorrow. Don’t even know what kinds of treats yet. It’ll be an adventure. I’ll post pictures.

Oh yeah.

One Last Thing.

Steve Jobs told me to start making note of questions and to create a FAQ. Which I’ve done. It’s at the bottom of the page, here. Thanks Steve.

Belle

I want to put this online, to hold myself accountable. I want to document the noise in my head. I’m tired of thinking about drinking. date of last drink: june 30, 2012

2 thoughts to “channelling steve jobs”

  1. Great to hear your voice! I finally listened to it, your site being back up and all. You are REAL. I like this! I am going to go and make myself a treat: an iced mocha (my only “permitted sweet” right now, which I am totes OK with), which translates to “adult chocolate milk.” And, I’m going to pat myself on the back because I am signing up for your class! 🙂

  2. What if this life was your vacation from stressing work on another plane of existence or another galaxy, or if you were a time-traveler from 500 years into the future, what would you like to do or become?

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