Tired of Thinking About Drinking

What Lane thinks about turning 100

Lane, Team 100 member, writes about turning “100”:

Lane: Hi Belle: Here are my thoughts on Day 100 (actually now it is 106 but who is counting, right?!):

Day one was mostly an empty promise. I made a promise to stop drinking to my husband for a bit that day but didn’t put a number on it and in my heart felt it wouldn’t last. We went to a BBQ that day and were told to BYOB so we brought water. The host had hard liquor on hand but no real mixers I liked so when they offered me a drink in their kitchen, while my husband was watching our kids in the pool, I passed. Not because I wasn’t drinking even though I had promised not to, but because none of it sounded good to me. If they’d had wine or beer I probably would have caved. I realized on the drive home that afternoon that I had attended, and survived, a social event sober but only just barely. It had been a long time (probably about 5 years) since that had happened. I decided that I would stay sober again the next day but promised myself no more than that. Those first days were all like that, one day at a time.

One day 3 I realized that the difficulty sleeping and night sweats were related to my drinking and really freaked out. I was having physical symptoms of abuse/dependence! Amazing. I never even realized how far I had fallen. I was hanging on by bloody finger stumps to the sober ledge but dammit I was holding on! I tore myself up, cried on the treadmill, cried while showering, and even cried while driving my kids to school. What had I done to myself?! I was a horrible addict and an even worse mother. I had to fix it. Unfortunately alcohol has such a grip that despite my realizations I am confident I would have slipped within a month.

Luckily I found you about 10 days in and began a journey to 100 days that had seemed impossible. Today I feel more in control of all aspects of my life: where I go and when, what I want to wear (I’ve lost 10 pounds!), working out consistently, keeping a positive attitude and not relying on wine to relax. It all seemed so impossible just 106 days ago but I did it! I really didn’t drink BY CHOICE (unlike by necessity when I was pregnant) for 100 days. I’ve given myself a gift and shown myself a better life. THANK YOU for holding my hand and leading the charge. I never would have made it here without you and Team 100. Beep beep! ~ Lane

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11 thoughts on “What Lane thinks about turning 100

  1. Lane congratulations. You have described so accurately the way we can be so deeply entrenched in the pit of alcohol and not realise it as more than just a little habit slighty starting to get in the way of LIFE!
    Thanks for your inspiring story. You are awesome!
    C x

    • lane on said:

      Thanks! I surprised myself by making it to and even past 100! I really appreciate the words of encouragement and the community here. πŸ™‚

  2. That is totally wonderful. Another big huge whoop whoop from down under. I can’t believe how many Team 100 members are just kicking arse. It is so awesome and inspiring! Yay!

    Oh and does everyone know that at 100 days you have to buy yourself a treat that costs 100 dollars or 100 pounds or 100 euros or 100 Thai baht (ok, maybe add a zero there) or whatever your local currency is.* Then post pics.

    πŸ™‚

    Lilly xx

    *New Team 100 sober rule made up on the fly by moi. It can also be applied retrospectively if you’re past 100 already.

  3. It’s great to read the stories of those who achieve the success and how they felt. I’m on Day 2 again here… short term goal to finish the month AF and then I’ll go from there.

    • lane on said:

      Short terms goals were what got me through the first month. After that I felt more confident. Day 2 is great! Keep on driving your sober car πŸ™‚

  4. Congratulations Lane!

  5. Inspiring…. Well done…

  6. Big congrats Lane!

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